Heartbreak is painful and terrible, but it happens to everyone. That depressed, defeated feeling is enough to scare even the most optimistic of lovers into closing themselves off. But heartbreak is a common experience, part of a normal love life, and you can get over it. Here are some steps to help you get over the pain.
Let go. Realize the relationship is truly over. You cannot begin moving on until you completely give up on that person. Put your former lover completely out your system. Discard the last shred of hope that you may get back together.
Come to terms with the relationship. Once you have accepted that it is over, you are ready to make amends with yourself. Forgive yourself for mistakes you may have made. Quit staying up at night thinking "If I had only done..." because it doesn't matter now. The relationship is over.
Stay busy. Keep your mind occupied, and if you can't keep your mind occupied, keep your body occupied. Try not to be alone. Go out with friends, play sports, take up a new hobby. Try to avoid the routines you used to follow during the relationship.
Seek new experiences. The best way to forget the old is to embrace the new. Now is a good time to broaden your horizons. Find out for yourself that there is more to life than that one lost love.
Break the habit. This person may have been a large part of your life. You may have had daily rituals that involved him or her. Avoid situations that remind you of their absence. Now you have to find other activities to fill the void.
Find a healthy outlet. Write in your journal or talk with friends. Get out all those nasty feelings: They are easier to deal with when they are on the table rather than pent up inside.
Tips & Warnings
- Know the balance between repressing negative emotions and letting them rule you. Don't spend all day crying in your room and hating the world, but don't become a bitter, unfeeling husk of a human being either.
- Employ daily affirmations. Remind yourself where you stand, how you are feeling, how you felt and how you want to feel.
- Beware of false hope. Don't misread signs and go back to thinking things can work out with your lost love; that will only set you back in the long run.