How to Build Trust in Your Relationship

Intimacy relies on trust. If want to get more intimate with your partner, you have to build the trust in your relationship. Sounds pretty easy, but what could trip you up is the underlying fears. You’re afraid of opening up; they’re afraid of being hurt. The great irony of trust is: you want trust because you are afraid of being hurt, yet your fear is what prevents you from gaining trust. Here is how to help build trust in your relationship.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

1. Know who you are and make sure your partner knows, too. Don’t be afraid of who you are. Until you are comfortable inside your skin, trust is always going to slip through your fingers.
2. Build respect for yourself. When you respect yourself as a person, you give others good reason to believe that you will respect them as people.
3. Let your actions match your words. When your partner can see that what you do and say line up, the trust is easy to come by.
4. Meet adversity in the relationship head-on and solve the problem. Letting things linger unresolved siphons away the trust because it puts a damper on the momentum of a relationship.
5. Give the person a reason to trust you. Share the exploits of your day. Talk about your plans for the future. Always be open and honest about what you are doing, and when you are doing it.
6. Be calm. Ever hear someone describe their partner as their rock? Being calm gets you there.
7. Talk to each other about everything, not just about the important stuff.
8. Compromise when facing a problem. By showing that you are willing to bend, your partner will also made adjustments.

Tips & Warnings

• Have faith in yourself and the other person. Belief influences outcomes in relationships.
• Don’t forget that learning to trust is just as important as building trust.
• Avoid secrets. Nothing ruins trust faster.
• Don’t lie about what you will be doing on the weekend with your friends. Be open and honest.
• Don’t deny your needs. You’ll wind up resenting the other person. Ask instead why you think your needs must go unmet in order for trust to flourish.