How to Wean Your Baby Cold-Turkey

Saying “so-long” to those halcyon days of nursing bliss is never easy, even when you can’t wait to get the little sucker off your chest. Weaning bit-by-bit can be psychological torture for a toddling tot, leaving him or her wondering when the milk bar will be open for business and when the counter will be cruelly closed. Simply stopping can shorten the suffering--for the baby and for you. Consider these steps if you decide to wean your baby cold-turkey.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

• Determination
• Emotional support
• Tissues
• Tight T-shirts

1. Prepare yourself psychologically for the end of nursing. While you may think that your breasts need a break and you can’t wait to tuck in your shirt and have some privacy again, you will probably still experience a strong sense of mourning when you cut the milk supply to your eager eater. Spend time savoring the experience and making good memories before stopping cold.
2. Prepare yourself physically for bulging milk ducts, aching breasts and a full frontal assault by your offspring. Being told “no” doesn’t mean she’ll take it lying down.
3. Set a date for cutting her off when you have no important occasions looming, you don’t need a happy, contented child for a public outing, and all judgmental friends or relatives are far away. Make sure your partner is on-board.
4. Nurse that last night before cutting off the flow. Look into your young one’s eyes and bask in his loving look or his blissed-out drunken gaze. Only you know when you’re ready to end this phase of life.
5. Don’t nurse her in the morning, but offer a warm bottle or a toddler cup instead. Expect it to be hurled across the room several times before accepted. Refuse to lift your shirt when it is ripped at by desperate hands. Offer soothing and kind words to explain that you love her, but you won’t be nursing her.
6. Don’t give in all day. Continue to offer warm milk and other foods when needed or at times consistent with your nursing schedule. Attempt to maintain the normal routine.
7. The first night is the worst. There may be tears, there may be recriminations and there may be verbal assaults of an unintelligible nature. Continue being kind, soothing and reliably available but non-nutritive. Your breasts will be throbbing.
   
   
8. Continue as on the first day, but apply heat to your breasts if needed to prevent infection. Hot showers help, and creating a letdown in the shower can relieve pressure. Avoid pumping as this can encourage milk production. Be emotionally available, but don’t breastfeed.
9. Depending on the age of your child, he or she may stop asking to nurse the next day, or the next month, or the next year… Consistently refusing and reassuring will make the transition as kind and swift as this change can be.

Tips & Warnings

• Isolate the mother and child the first night of weaning, moving any other family members out of earshot.
• Maintain a calm and loving atmosphere even in the face of violent protest. To your tot, this is a life or death struggle for survival. Give physical and verbal reassurance, cuddle and carry constantly if necessary. But don’t give in.
• Make your breasts physically unavailable while you’re sleeping to ward off a toddler sneak attack. Several layers of tight T-shirts will defy entry.
• If the sight of your child or the sound of her cries creates a letdown, press firmly on your nipples to halt the flow. Wearing a tight bra can also help prevent a letdown.
• Don’t cold-turkey a child under the age of 1 or a child 1+ years old who hasn’t adjusted to taking fluids in a toddler cup or bottle. Dehydration is dangerous!
• Don’t ignore painful breasts, especially if they are hot to the touch or have red streaks. Mastitis is no fun and needs immediate medical attention.
• Try telling stories about when you used to nurse, and emphasize your child’s former infancy and new mature status. This can honor the past, yet celebrate your future as mother and child.
• Don’t be alarmed if the request to nurse continues for a long time. Nursing is a bonding, loving time between mother and child. Many toddlers and preschoolers pat their mother’s breasts with fond remembrance. If there is genuine long-term distress, see a lactation consultant at your hospital or midwife’s office for advice.