Step1
We focus on the positive, make sure everyone has a clear understanding of expectations, and established ground rules at a very early age.
Step2
Establish routines early in your child’s life for bedtime, meals, and playtime. I know it’s hard when asked ‘just a few more minutes’ but you must stand firm. It actually makes things easier for everyone.
Step3
Meet with their teachers at the beginning of the school year to understand their teaching styles and requirements. Again to set expectations for the kids.
Step4
Your kids are also aware of their responsibilities at home too because you have established ground rules.
Step5
The foundation has been set and you’ve begun notice a few infractions, its best to take action immediately before things escalate.
Step6
1st time: Calmly discuss the infraction, find out what happened, and make sure the child agrees it won’t happen again.
Step7
2nd time: Repeat previous discussion but also ask how the child intends to prevent this from occurring again. And what are the consequences if it happens again.
Step8
3rd time: Now it’s time to step back and evaluate the situation closely. Is the child looking for attention and the only time it’s provided is when there’s a problem? Are there issues at home or school you’re not aware of? Are there physiological issues such as entering puberty? You want to eliminate all possibilities before you have this discussion.
Step9
If you’re mad don’t have the discussion. If you say something in anger, you can never take it back. ‘I’m sorry’ won’t erase it. Let the child know you’re aware of what happened, you will talk about it later and what the punishment will be. This will give you an opportunity to calm down and make the child worry.
Step10
If you’re married have a strategy meeting to discuss the game plan and punishment. Make sure you’re both in agreement before you meet with your child. You have to present a united front.
Step11
Don’t drag it out….both of you meet with the child to have this discussion within a day or two after the occurrence. Allow everyone an opportunity to speak without interruptions. The goal as parents is to truly understand what caused your child to do this. Make sure the punishment fits the crime and don’t give in once implemented. If no TV for 2 weeks, that means 2 weeks.
How to Discipline Your Kids
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Comments
GoBucs said
on 8/1/2008 andyc1909: Where did you get those rose colored glasses you apparently see the world through?! "Inducing worry in a child"??? PLEASE! "Feeling good gets you through the difficult times of life" that's absolutely hilarious!
Melanie1199 said
on 6/27/2007 I feel that step 9 is necessary at times for both the parent and the child. If my son does something bad enough to make me angry then I do just as step 9 described. This way I get a moment to take a breath and think rational on how to proceed as opposed to potentially flying off the handle. I will not discipline my child when I'm angry because that's a punishment, not teaching a lesson he needs. As for the child worrying, I think that is the best punishment, at least with my child. The anticipation of "what's mommy going to do?" has a greater impact to him than anything I could ever say or do myself. When my son does something that forces me to take a step away he knows he messed up and he never does that again (so far, knock on wood :)).
andyc1909 said
on 12/15/2006 Im not sure about in step 9 inducing worry in a child. Shouldn't be necessary in a calm reasoned scenario. It's not a good feeling and we should all feel good whilst on this earth, feeling good gets you through the difficult times of life.