How to fit in like an Oregonian :)

If moving to Oregon, there are some things you will want to research, know and most likely “live by” to fit in. Oregonians take pride in the moss and large trees that are predominant in almost all areas of the state and its important that you understand that there is a culture built around these woods.

Difficulty: Challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Unbrella
• REI Credit Card
• Four-Wheeled Vehicle

1. 
    

   WARDROBE - this is the first place to start as most Oregonians will first judge you based on a how "Northwest" or even "Pacific Northwest" you look. At minimum, there are a couple staples that you should start with. The Teva Sport Sandal, even as strange as a sport or hiking sandal concept sounds, these shoes have been a "Must-Have" among NW residents for years. To get extra kudos, you might want to wear them with white socks... as sandals are not just for the beach anymore! PLEASE NOTE: You should own a casual pair (with Nylon Straps) for perusing the mall and a Dressier pair (Leather) for those nights hanging out at the micro-beer establishments on "eco-trendy" 23rd Street.

2. 
    

   SHOPPING - There is only one place that you need to remember, REI. Make sure that you visit this store frequently as Gortex textiles come in an ever-changing color combinations and products. Not only are these functional but they scream "I am outdoorsy" even if you haven’t camped or hiked since last 4th of July. PLEASE NOTE: Even though you may visit REI every weekend, you should get their mail ordered catalog and conveniently it on your coffee table for friends too see.

3. 
    

   OH YA, COFFEE - Coffee is more of a statement than it is a beverage in the NW. Having a coffee in you hands at all times speaks the world to fellow NW'ers. This not only conjures up visions that "you must have" just come from the intellectual hub which is known as Powels Book Store, but it also is perceived that your act is so together that you have plenty of time to frequent the largest chain in the world - Starbucks. PLEASE NOTE: Just having a beverage in your hand is just the first step. You must understand the different sizes of coffee, they don’t just call them Small-Medium-Large. Also, even though coffee beans come from another part of the world, NW'ers still believe that the NW is thee mecca for coffee... Don't disagree as you will be excluded from many office breaks.

4. 
    

   TRANSPORTATION - how you arrive at the mall is very important. If you are the kind of person that likes "Flashy Cars" (as NW'ers call them) such as BMWs, Sportscars, etc., it is best to leave them in the garage. The standard of cars starts with the ever-popular Subaru 4wheel drive station wagon. This car in particular, has the perfect blend of practicality and adventurousness and is often seen with the more rugged off-road package. Now if your budget can afford something even nicer than a Subaru, you can still step into a luxury car like the Volvo of road version of their wagon with out being branded as a "materialistic Bush lover". PLEASE NOTE: If upgrading your vehicle, the biggest accessory you can get is a Yakima roof-rack. Make sure to get all the attachment available for the rack (Ski rack, bike rack, canoe rack, etc.) even if you do not do any of these activities. You will find out that not many others do them that often either.

[ttfweb]

on 1/27/2008 Also, never carry an umbella - it's a dead give-away you are from somewhere else. Get a goretex jacket with a hood.

[riggyrules]

on 9/29/2006 Cant forget to eat nothing but granola and bathe in petuli oil (if bathing at all)