How to Plan an Indoor or Outdoor Wedding

Congratulations on your engagement! Whether this is your first trip down the aisle or the second (or third), any wedding requires an incredible amount of preparation, planning and big bucks–—just one reason some brides and grooms opt to marry at city hall. If you and your betrothed vow to tie the knot with a wedding that'll wow your family and friends, say "I do" to the following planning advice.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Every Wedding

1. Choose a date. Consider all factors, including venue availability, work schedules, family commitments, travel plans of friends and family, holidays and preparation time. Some venues and vendors give discounts for weddings on nontraditional days such as Friday and Sunday. Also think about when you want to hold the wedding; a morning or afternoon reception may be cheaper than the typical Saturday night. Off-peak times of the year, such as after the holidays, may also be discounted.

2. Decide on the size and type of wedding you'd like. Your dream wedding may be entirely different from that of your betrothed. Discuss the desire for a formal or casual event, the ideal location, how many people you'd like to invite (and who they are), as well as family expectations. If you have an elegant evening wedding in mind and your partner thinks a luau on the beach would be perfect, keep talking until you close the gap.

3. Set a budget. When looking at options and making choices, bear in mind: Who's paying? What can they can afford? How formal will it be? See 325 Budget for a Wedding.

4. Select a venue. Find out if there will be another event at the same time as yours. Ask if you can hire an outside caterer.

5. Choose an officiant. Find someone whose beliefs resonate with yours. Select from a wide range of religious officiants, a judge or justice of the peace–—or have a friend do the honors (see Tips).

6. Decide if you want attendants. Choose them early so they can help you (see 333 Prepare to be a Maid of Honor and 334 Execute Best Man Duties). Let bridesmaids and groomsmen know how much you appreciate their accepting this important and costly role in your wedding.

7. Create the guest list based on the venue's capacity limit and your budget. Get additional names from both sets of parents and divide the list into must-have people and those you hope to fit in. Get a firm quote from the caterer before the final cut so you can trim names if the budget requires it (see 331 Hire a Caterer).

8. Order a cake. Browse bridal magazines, get references from friends and call around. Schedule a complimentary tasting session with your top two choices. Expect to pay $2 to $15 (or more) per slice.

9. Work with a florist to select your flowers, including centerpieces. Keep in mind that flowers are more expensive and are in limited availability during the winter.

10. Hire someone to capture the big day on film. Whether you want movies or black and white, color or digital pictures, find a professional videographer or photographer. See 330 Hire a Photographer.

11. Buy your wedding gown, either off the rack (with alterations) or from a dressmaker. Expect custom-made gowns to require up to several months for fittings. Coordinate shoes, stockings, veil and headpiece.

12. Order custom invitations or design and print your own.

13. Send out a "save the date" notice at least 6 months in advance for people needing to make travel and hotel arrangements, or if it's a holiday weekend. Include a list of contacts for lodging and car rentals.

Outdoor Weddings

14. Check out "The Complete Outdoor Wedding Planner" by Sharon Naylor for tips on how to handle all the outdoor details.

15. Select shoes and a dress style (for brides and attendants) that will work in any weather. Stay away from long trailing hemlines that would be ruined by mud or even damp grass. Choose a warm wrap for yourself and your bridesmaids to throw on as the evening temperatures drop.

16. Determine how many chairs, tables, linens, portable toilets and gas heaters you'll need to rent. Expect your caterer, band and photographer to build in additional costs to transport food and equipment to remote or out-of-the-way locations.

17. Keep the comfort of your guests foremost in mind. Situate chairs so they don't face directly into the setting sun. Consider rigging a shade-cloth awning if your nuptials are planned for a hot summer day.

18. Use a microphone in any group larger than 25 people, or your guests may not be able to hear the "I do's." Test wiring, acoustics, wind distortion, extension cords and speakers ahead of time.

19. Keep the ceremony itself short and sweet. Don't ask guests to survive a long ceremony while braving the elements. Be prepared for any weather. Have plenty of umbrellas and raincoats if there is any possibility at all of rain. Take a deep breath should rain or snow delay the arrival of guests, officiants and vendors.

Tips & Warnings

• Purchase a binder or a large expanding file and create a section for everything, such a the officiant, gown, reception, caterer, florist, photographer, bridesmaids, maid of honor and best man. Stash phone numbers, business cards and records of key phone conversations in the appropriate pockets.
• Hire a wedding planner, especially if you're pressed for time or feeling overwhelmed (see 329 Hire an Event Planner). But don't be a control freak. Let him or her do the job you're paying for.
• Ask the venue coordinator for a list of preferred vendors to make your search easier.
• All-inclusive resorts make getting hitched easy with budget-friendly packages and on-site wedding planners to help every step of the way.
• Create dramatic lighting for evening weddings by stringing lights through trees and placing candles, luminaria and torches all around.
• Plant flowers 6 weeks earlier so they're in full bloom on the big day.
• At the Universal Life Church Monastery you can fill out a form online, pay $12 and presto! You're an ordained minister. (See Resources. Laws vary by state.)
• Make sure there's an easy and accessible way for elderly or disabled guests to get to the ceremony site.
• Bear in mind that sunset ceremonies, while gorgeous, are often difficult to view and to photograph. The bride and groom are often backlit, and the photographs show all the guests screening their eyes with their programs.
• Find out if you need a permit to hold your wedding on the beach. Or choose to have your wedding on the beach fronting a resort or restaurant.
• It's a fact that whoever pays for the wedding exerts a fair amount of control over the process. If that is the bride's parents, the mother of the bride should be consulted. A delicate balancing act between mother's and daughter's wishes? You bet.
• Be extremely considerate when you're borrowing a house or garden for your wedding–—the generous offer adds considerable expense, time and anxiety to the owner's life.
• Put together a solid plan B in case of bad weather. Select a venue that has an indoor alternative, like a museum, a hall or even a barn. Look into renting tents or large awnings.

[ajm41789]

on 8/24/2009 Planning a wedding? The Universal Life Church Monastery in Seattle offers a 3-step guide to performing a wedding ceremony.

They are a great organization that I have been with for many years, their history includes celebrity ministers and many first amendment battles securing the rights of ministers and people to practice religion freely or not at all.

[DTurbo]

on 4/17/2007 DO NOT invite Dennis Rodman to your wedding. I made that mistake years ago. When my wife threw the bouchet, he boxed all the women out and grabbed it, then he threw his elbows around. Most inappropriate.

on 11/22/2005 If you are having a church wedding, I recommend booking the church first, and the other vendors after that. It would be a shame to book everything else and pay deposits then find out that your church isn't available for the date and time you want.