How to Acknowledge Family Members in a Wedding Ceremony

Mothers traditionally have a role in the unity candle portion of the ceremony.

Although a wedding is mainly about the joining in marriage of two people, families often play a large role in the lives of the bride and groom, which can make it feel natural to include them in the wedding ceremony. Specific family members can be acknowledged during the wedding ceremony in a subtle way, or you could have them participate in a highly visible aspect of the ceremony, depending on your preference and your relationship with them.

Things You'll Need

• Wedding program
• Ceremony script
• Unity candle
• Taper candles
• Readings

Instructions

1. Print a thank-you note to family members, such as your parents, on the back or bottom of the wedding program. You could write a simple, "Thank you for your love and support," or include a longer message, poem or quotation that conveys your feelings and gratitude.

2. Involve family members in a portion of the ceremony. If you are including a unity candle in your ceremony, invite the mothers of the bride and groom to light the two taper candles, which the bride and groom then use to light the unity candle at the center. The unity candle is generally seen as symbolizing the uniting of your two families, so this action brings your family members into the wedding ceremony physically, while also providing a symbolic acknowledgment of their importance.

3. Ask the officiant to speak a few words acknowledging family members in the ceremony. For example, when the officiant is greeting the group gathered, have him specifically welcome a few individuals by saying, for example, "Welcome friends and family members of the bride and groom, the bride and groom's parents, and the groom's 101-year-old great-grandmother." He might also say a few words about how your families have supported you over the years, or about their importance to you.

4. Ask a special aunt, uncle, cousin or sibling to do a reading during the wedding. Give the officiant a list of everyone who will be doing readings and their relationships to you so she can properly introduce your relatives. For example, the officiant might say, "Julie Rhodes, the great-aunt of the bride, is offering the first reading."

5. Involve the parents of the bride and groom in the wedding vows. Before saying the vows to each other, have the officiant invite the parents of the bride and the groom up to give them a final embrace before they are joined as husband and wife.

References

• The Knot: Wedding Programs Top 4 QA's
• The Knot: Alternatives to Unity Candles