How to Restore Friendship Through Forgiveness

Forgiveness helps restore friendship.

All friendships eventually weather conflict. Although minor conflicts are easy to move past, some betrayals threaten to permanently damage or end friendships. Letting go of hurt and resentment can seem impossible, especially when the pain feels overwhelming. However, forgiving your friend's mistake is an essential step towards strengthening and rebuilding your friendship. Forgiveness is good for you, too; forgiving past wrongs lowers your stress level, improves your cardiovascular health and gives you control of your happiness, according to Harvard Health Publications.

Instructions

1. Acknowledge the pain you feel. Write in a journal or confide in a spiritual leader or a trusted friend.

2. Practice relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing and visualization, to stay calm even when you feel angry or hurt.

3. Think about your friend's situation and why she made her mistake. Without condoning her actions, think of why her situation prompted her choice. Empathy helps you forgive and move on.

4. Choose to let go of your hurt and resentment. Don't expect to feel better immediately; forgiveness is a process, and you might have to remind yourself to forgive several times.

5. Connect with your friend. Call her, send her a note or make plans to spend time together. Making positive memories together helps rebuild your connection.

Tips & Warnings

• Depending on your friend's actions, you may not want to remain friends. However, you can still forgive her and let go of the resentment, whether or not you want to rebuild your friendship.

References

• Harvard Health Publications: Power of Forgiveness - Forgive Others
• Chicago Theological Seminary: The Journey to Forgiveness
• Greater Good: Nine Steps to Forgiveness