How to Share Differences of Opinions

Sharing differences of opinion doesn't have to be a negative situation.

When your opinion differs from a friend's or loved one's, you might be uncertain how to proceed in a discussion. Sharing differences of opinion doesn't have to result in arguments or hurt feelings. Every person has a viewpoint on the world, including you, and should be able to share it. Sharing your opinion with friends or loved ones might help open their minds and yours to other possibilities.

Instructions

1. Keep an open mind going into the conversation. Close-mindedness will not allow you to fully connect with the person to whom you are talking. This is important if you want the other person to respect your opinion in the matter; you need to give respect and open-mindedness in order to receive it.

2. Talk face-to-face to avoid any part of the conversation getting lost in translation. This allows you and the person you are conversing with to notice tone of voice, body language and other subtle non-verbals in the communication process. These are important factors when discussing a difference of opinion with another person. A person can easily take an email the wrong way and end up with hurt feelings.

3. Allow each person in the conversation time to express his feelings and sentiments. Each person should be given ample, uninterrupted time to state his opinions. Set a timer if necessary to keep you or him from monopolizing the conversation or to make sure each person gets the same amount of conversation time.

4. Ask clarifying questions if necessary and avoid making assumptions about what the other person is saying. Use "I" statements when expressing your opinions to avoid confrontational language. Stay calm and collected when discussing how you feel or when asking questions. Take a five minute break to clear the air if things get too heated during the discussion.

5. Agree to disagree if you are unable to find any common ground to build upon. No one ever said you would agree with every person you speak to on all issues, so it is OK to respectfully disagree with another person's opinion or point of view.

Tips & Warnings

• Try to learn all you can from the other person's point of view. You might be surprised how you feel if you stay open to what he is saying and consider all the possibilities in any given situation.

References

• John Place Online; How to Disagree and Persuade without Offending; July 2007

Resources

• National Service Resources; Resource Center; Resolving differences of opinion