How to Include Parents in a Wedding Ceremony

Stepparents or grandparents can also play a role.

Your wedding day may be bittersweet for your parents, as they watch you become part of another family. Including them in your ceremony lets you show them how much you appreciate them. Asking both sets of parents to participate equally also gives them something to bond over, which is ideal if they don’t know each other well. Talk to your fiance about the roles you envision for your parents so you can come to an agreement before letting your parents in on your plans.

Things You'll Need

• Readings
• Sand
• Glass cups
• Glass vase

Instructions

1. Ask them all to walk down the aisle with you. The groom should enter first with his mother and father on either side, followed by the bridal party and the bride. As the bride, ask both your parents to accompany you down the aisle. Some brides like to enter on their own as a symbol of independence. Ask your parents to wait halfway down the aisle and walk you from that point to the altar as a way of honoring both your independence and their importance in your life.

2. Assign each parent a reading to deliver. If you don’t want to have four readings, give each couple one reading to deliver. Ask them to stand at the lectern together and alternate lines or each read one half.

3. Ask any of the parents with musical talents to perform during the ceremony. Though your father's playing the banjo might not be suitable, a parent who has a beautiful singing voice or can play the piano or violin can perform a piece during the ceremony.

4. Ask the officiant to mention your parents’ importance during the ceremony. Write a short paragraph about what your parents mean to you, or ask the officiant to simply mention that you both feel grateful to be blessed with wonderful parents. Ask him to say these words when he’s first beginning the ceremony or during the homily or message.

5. Invite all your parents up for a unity ceremony toward the end of the wedding. Give each parent a small container of sand and ask them all to pour their sand simultaneously into a vase, symbolizing the joining of both families.

References

• "Martha Stewart Weddings"; Meaningful Roles for Parents; Summer 2006