How to Make Small Talk With Your Spouse

Changing your routine can yield new conversation topics with a spouse.

If you are married to one person for long enough, it's possible that at some point you'll simply run out of things to talk about. When that happens, you'll need to go back to the beginning and learn to small talk with each other all over again. Some ways out of this potentially awkward situation include taking up a new interest, adding random questions to your daily conversation and imagining your future together.

Instructions

1. Take up a new interest. After so many years together, it's inevitable that some degree of routine will replace what was once spontaneity, rendering your spouse capable of anticipating your every conversational gambit. By starting something new, you'll have plenty to talk about, whether it's the glaze you're using in your pottery class, a showoff you both can't stand or an expanded circle of friends.

2. Add random questions to your daily conversation. For example, you can ask your spouse which member of the Brat Pack he most admires, which historical era she would want to live in or his favorite horror movie. Or, go in the other direction and talk about the big issues that don't come up every day, such as what your wife believes about life after death, or a time when your husband felt completely loved.

3. Imagine your future together. Toss out practicality and fantasize about traveling together to anywhere in the world, or giving up everything to move to a new country and start a dream business. Imagine how your relationship would be different if you lived on a farm, a houseboat or in a seaside fishing village. Add to the story over time, giving it new details and picturing the ways you would overcome the challenges. Use the story as a way to reintroduce yourselves to each other, and get past small talk.

References

• Future Scopes: 20 Conversation Topics for Couples - Talking to your Partner;
• Marriage Missions: Conversation Starters for Married Couples