How to Handle Disciplining Nephews

The discipline techniques you decide to use must be age appropriate.

Disciplining children is tough. Regardless of your relationship with the child you are attempting to discipline, your techniques must be appropriate based on the behavior and the age of the children. If you have the task of disciplining your nephews, you must do so in a manner that will not negatively impact your relationship with them. Before disciplining them, assess whether your chosen technique fits the situation. It is never a good idea to discipline children while you are upset. If you are upset, take a moment to calm down before making any decisions regarding discipline.

Instructions

1. Redirect the children's attention to appropriate behavior. This can be done by putting them on alert that their behavior at that moment is inappropriate and must change immediately. Speak directly and firmly so they know you are serious. If the children do not make changes to their behavior, continue with the following steps.

2. Provide an explanation as to why their behavior is not appropriate. If you are not the primary caretaker of your nephews, you may have a different idea of appropriate behavior. By explaining exactly why their behavior must change, they might use better judgment in the future.

3. Use the time-out method. Time-out is the physical removal of children from a problematic situation. Time-outs should be taken in an area that is neutral and somewhat boring. Time-outs should not last longer than 5 minutes; 1 minute per year of life is an appropriate way of timing. Time-outs may not be an effective method of discipline for children over the age of five. Children over the age of five can understand the concept of grounding and this technique should be used with them instead of time-outs. Grounding involves the restriction of privileges. For example, if you ground your nephews, you can take away television privileges or permission to attend a social event.

4. Establish rules. By establishing rules you may be able to prevent inappropriate behavior before it happens. Speak with your nephews about how you expect them to behave. Explain that they will be punished for any behavior that is outside what you deem to be acceptable.

Tips & Warnings

• There are many views on corporal punishment. Physically disciplining your nephews is something you will need to discuss with their parents.

References

• Kids Health: Disciplining Your Child
• Keep Kids Healthy: Discipline Guide for Children
• Old Dominion University; 101 Positive Discipline Techniques; Elizabeth Cooper

Resources

• Child Welfare League of America
• Oprah; Some Good Ways to Discipline Children; Bill Cosby and Alvin Poussaint