How To

How to Find the Ideal Wedding Officiant

Contributor
By eHow Contributing Writer
(5 Ratings)

You need just the right person to make taking your marriage vows truly memorable--an officiant willing to create the perfect ceremony that captures your personalities and beliefs.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy
Instructions
  1. Step 1

    Find someone whose beliefs resonate with yours and who can speak eloquently on your behalf. You'll want to meet several times to discuss the ceremony and come to a mutual accord. Officiants can suggest vows or help you fine-tune your own.

  2. Step 2

    Choose from a wide pool of possible religious officiants: priests, rabbis, Catholic scholars, theologians and cantors. If you hold a religious ceremony in a church or synagogue, you may need to use their officiant.

  3. Step 3

    A judge or justice of the peace can do the honors, as can a mayor, governor, county clerk, notary, legally ordained minister or anyone who is deputized to perform a one-time ceremony.

  4. Step 4

    Have a friend become a minister. At the Universal Life Church (ulc.com) you can fill out an online form, pay $12, and voila`! You're an ordained minister. (Check laws in your state.)

  5. Step 5

    Budget the officiant's fees into your overall cost of the wedding. Traditionally paid for by the groom, they can run from $100 to $300 or more, with travel and facility costs extra.

Tips & Warnings
  • Many religious officiators require couples to undergo premarital counseling. This could be just a few questions or a series of meetings to discuss your relationship, faith and commitment to one another.

Comments  

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on 11/12/2008 People marrying in a church or other religious facility don't need to "find" an officiate (the correct word btw). If you're looking for someone for a non-traditional venue, it's up to you how much time you want to spend working with the person on your ceremony. E-mail is great and an experienced minister will know how to make it work regardless of your time constraints. www.AsYouLikeItCeremonies.com

weddingrev said

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on 10/19/2006 Meeting the officiant at least ONE time is critical. The feeling that you and the officiant get from each other is not something that you can get on the phone. I visit with everyone one time before committing to work with them. In cases in which the couple is out of town, I make sure we speak on the phone or email during the time I'm writing their ceremony, so I can understand them better. For an officiant that does not write the ceremony for the couple, then one meeting is probably sufficient to get to know the couple briefly, explain how he or she works, and talk about the legal issues.

BeSmart said

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on 10/2/2006 Meet several times with a wedding officiant?? Who has time?
My wife and I found a wedding officiant online who was very smart and glib. We are busy people and he didn't require a meeting at all. He was professional, on time to the wedding, and explained all the legalities to us concisely. It's my understanding that in the old days you met with the minister of your church to talk about your relationship as a couple with the church community. But when you are looking for a good wedding officiant, why do you have to meet with them? As long as you can talk to them on the phone or in emails and realize their intelligence and poise, and their knowledge about their legal responsibilities in filling out the marriage license, then that's all you need to do.

Anonymous

Anonymous said

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on 8/23/2006 Whoever you get to be your officiant, make sure they do your ceremony. If you give and let the officiant have their wishes, you may regret it forever. Don't be rude, but be firm.

Anonymous

Anonymous said

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on 8/8/2006 I recommend to couples that they always get an experienced Officiant, rather than have a friend get ordained for the day. Friends are wonderful, but not everyone is an experienced public speaker.Your wedding is one of the most important days of your life. Why take the chance that the Officiant will unintentionally make it a disaster? Also, interview 2 or 3 officiants and choose the one that really is a nice fit for you.

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