How To Do Just About Everything
By eHow Relationships & Family Editor
Cope With Grief
Rate: (7 Ratings)
It's common to grieve for a year or more after a major loss. Give yourself time, and get the support you need.
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Comments
RFerriANP said
on 4/25/2008 As someone who has worked with dying for decades I can tell you that all I thought I knew about grief went out the window the day my partner of 26 years dropped dead. John’s sudden death did not make any sense to me and still doesn’t nearly two years later. All I can say about grieving is that there IS NOT ANY ONE WAY TO GRIEVE. Forget us "experts" and follow your own path but please make use you keep touchstones of support on the pathway. Take the time you need and don’t worry about anyone else’s “expectations” for your grieving process.
revisitingnixon said
on 4/17/2007 My best friend has always been there for me through the rough times. It's great to have someone who understands your situation and can relate with the pain you're going through after a death.
jpchleapas said
on 4/17/2007 I can relate to grief. I lost my Mom back on 9/2/79 and many other close friends over the following years. I still miss her today. Later on after my own injury I earned my first degree to take X-rays in 1992. There was no work then for x-ray techs so I went on for my business degree in hospital management. I graduated magna cum laude after a total of five years from 9/1990 to 6/1995 at Northeastern in Boston earning my two college degrees. Six days after I graduated I had a doctor at the Lahey Clinic in Burlington, MA named Leonard Zinman cost me 21+ operations due to his surgical negligence. To hide his multiple mistake(s) he rewrote my operative notes, and my medical records 8 months after the original ones were written. My hospital records vanished or were lost at no less than 3 hospitals. Even the foreign bodies Zinman left in me that were removed at New England Deaconess hospital were lost when by law they must be kept for over ten years. My VA records vanished also. Dr. Zinman trained at the VA and had full privileges at New England Deaconess hospital in Boston. Plus Dr. Little was doing a rotation there and we came face to face so he informed Zinman of my almost dying from septic shock for the 2nd time due to the foreign bodies they removed during an second exploratory abdominal surgery. They were shocked to have found what Zinman left in my body. Zinman even created and billed Medicare for at least one phony office visit I never had with him to build his false story of what happened to me. A second doctor named Arthur Little helped him rewrite my Emergency Room visit records at the Lahey Clinic to lie and not disclose the fact that the sole reason for my visit to the ER was due to him. Dr. Little discovered that Zinman negligently left on a pump he inserted in my body to help with urinary stress incontinence due to a spinal cord injury. When I confronted Dr. Little about this in my hospital room months later at the Lahey Clinic when I first learned of the falsification of my medical records he sat next to my bed and he laughed at me with arrogance and contempt. I spent 30 days in that hospital and endured 3 more operations during my last stay there in February of 1996. Dr. Little was actually pleased like a small child who got away with a mean spirited nasty prank. Except this prank helped cover up the negligence that ruined my health. This all happened to me six days after my graduation from Northeastern University in 1995. I was supposed to start in the coveted two year training program with the US Navy to work as a civilian Budget Analyst in the Spring of 1996. I had been accepted from a long list of candidates. I earned my first degree in Radiological Technology in 1992 and my 2nd degree in hospital management in 1995. My kidney function was permanently damaged, hearing loss, and many other unpleasant permanent physical injuries that devastated my health were covered up by Zinman to avoid the lawsuit. A medical malpractice lawsuit, or settlement would have been in the seven figure range if the real truth had come out of exactly what damage(s)Zinman had done to my body. You can read my story by typing in Leonard Zinman negligence in the search engine using Google. You can read my story and look at the polygraph test I took to prove I am telling the truth. The last two plus years I have also had to become the sole caregiver for my elderly Dad which has taken a bit out of me also. It took me years to learn to control the anger and grief issues over this nightmare. What everyone with any type of grief or anger issue has to understand is no one can fully understand exactly how they feel except other people who have suffered the same type of loss. Even close friends or people we may have thought to be close friends turn out to be less than we had given them credit for. The trick is to never quit, or give in. Hang in there. It will get better over time. John Chleapas - Framingham, MA
samantha said
on 3/10/2007 Ive lost my parents in my 20's and my older brother to cancer 5 years ago. In july of 2006 I lost my father in law and in August my husband took our teen ager floating down the river mind you she had just broke her hip in 3 places 2 monthes prior he was raised here but the river was stronger.In october my totaly awsome nephew lost the fight against drugs. This week a family friend fell 25 stories off of a roof. They say god only gives you what you can handle -WELL I CAN'T HANDLE ANYMORE. But I have to be strong for my children so I will not give up I will not become and alcoholic or a drug user. I WILL SURVIVE and so will you.
lesleym said
on 2/3/2007 you have always got to remember that we will all meet up again on the other side and that we are only on this earth for a short time. my uncle died yesterday and i spent all night cryin. my dad was especially close to my uncle and hasn't cried yet but I will be there for him when he does. The thing that is keeping me strong is that i know one day i will meet him again.