How to Deal With Arrogant and Judgmental People

Arrogance creates conflicts in the workplace.

As long as people must interact with one another, inevitably they will come in contact with others who are difficult to get along with. Among the most annoying are those who are judgmental – stating unsolicited opinions about other people’s conduct – and arrogant – exhibiting an attitude of superiority over others. If these individuals are family members or co-workers who can’t easily be avoided, you can adopt skills for dealing with them.

Instructions

1. Keep your cool. Ignore bragging and do not rise to the bait by challenging claims. Let your actions speak for themselves.

2. Stay upbeat. If the judgmental person in your life is a family member – your mother, for instance – the emotional connection may make negative judgments more toxic. It will not be easy to avoid her, but that does not mean you have to allow any judgmental, damaging statements to demoralize you. Turn the tables by telling her you are concerned about her negative outlook. Suggest that she may be troubled and could benefit from professional counseling.

3. Agree with the judgment. Don’t be manipulated into arguing or becoming defensive. When your mother makes a veiled remark about your weight, such as “Those jeans look a little tight on you,” bite your tongue and respond cheerfully: “You know, you may be right. I’d better start hitting the gym again.” Then let the matter drop. If your father constantly remarks on your career choice, reply enthusiastically, “Oh, I love my job! Just the other day. . .” and change the subject.

4. Consider the source. If the arrogant person is a co-worker with no authority over you, ignore him. If the judgmental comments are from your boss, however, pay attention and address the issues --no matter how they may be presented to you.

5. Try to understand. Arrogant people may simply be insecure and covering up by insisting they know better than everyone else. A judgmental person may simply need to feel respected and to believe his opinions matter. Engage him in conversation and try to understand his point of view.

6. Pick your battles. Close encounters of the arrogant kind can be easily ignored when they are brief and public. Remember, judgmental words or arrogant actions of others can't change the person you are.

References

• Fuel My Motivation; Dealing With Arrogant People; You Can Get the Upper Hand
• womensforum; Negative Judgmental People; How Can I Deal With Negative Judgmental People