How to Deal With a Bullying Recruiter

You can deal with a bullying recruiter.

Whether you're actively seeking work or are happily employed, it's not unusual to cross paths with a recruiter. It's their job to find the right candidates for their clients, and they will search far and wide to locate them.



Working with a recruiter, however, can be a trying experience, and some job seekers may even feel bullied. Keep in mind that bullying involves oppression of a psychological nature, and usually comes in the form of invalid or unwarranted criticism, profanity, intimidation or public humiliation.



If you feel a recruiter is bullying you, there are specific steps you should follow to gain control of the situation.

Instructions

Dealing with the Bully

1. Recognize that bullying is about control. It typically has nothing to do with your performance, so you are not the source of the problem. The bully's behavior is most likely a projection of his own weaknesses or shortcomings.

2. End the relationship immediately. This shouldn't be considered a failure to cope on your part. Dismissing a bully is one of the most positive things you can do to regain control and show them that his or her behavior is not acceptable.

3. Be aware that most bullies will try to blame you when you confront them. Don't allow a bully to tell you that she insists on high standards or that you misunderstood their message. Again, bullying is about control of power and abusing respect. It is not about miscommunication, a clash of personalities or trying to bring out the best in people to increase their performance.

4. Expose the bully. Keep records that explain the nature of the bullying, such as dates and times of incidents and what was said so you can report it to the recruiter's manager.

5. Search for the bully's name on the Internet. Chances are you're not the only one who has been bullied, and if you can find other instances of bullying, you can use it to strengthen your own complaint.

Tips & Warnings

• Unless bullying involves harassment based on race, religion, sex, age or disability, it is not illegal in the U.S., so it is something you will have to take control of yourself.

References

• Understanding andHein Online: Preventing Bullying; David P. Farrington, 1993
• Are Workplace Bullies Sabotaging Your Pepperdine University; Ability to Compete; John Richardson and Linnea McCord; 1991
• Chicago Tribune; How to Handle Workplace Bullies; Nara Schoenberg; March 22, 2011