What Is the Easiest Way to Break Up With an Abusive Boyfriend?

It's not always easy to end an abusive relationship.

There are several different types of abusive, unhealthy relationships. Abuse ranges from physical abuse to mental abuse. Both short- and long-term relationships can be affected by abuse, and the abused person may never see it coming. Many times, the best - and only - solution to the problem is to end the relationship for good. However, even though you may understand and accept that you're in an abusive relationship that must end, the actual breakup won't necessarily go smoothly.

Instructions

1. Focus on the reasons why the relationship must end instead of thinking about the good times and positive aspects of the relationship. Feeling sad about leaving your boyfriend may convince you that it's not the best choice when, in reality, it is.

2. Explain to your boyfriend clearly that you want to break up and the reasons for your decision. Instead of assigning blame to him and being insulting, give general reasons as to why the relationship isn't working.

3. Prepare for a negative reaction to the news from your boyfriend. If you feel that you may be in physical danger, ensure that someone is with you or in the next room during the conversation. You may even want to consider discussing the breakup over the phone instead of in person.

4. Separate yourself physically from your boyfriend. By spending time apart, even before the breakup is finalized, you will be able to get distance from and clarity on the situation. Looking at the relationship and your relationship problems with a clear head will let you sort out the issues of abuse. Doing so will help you get out of your current relationship and prevent the same problems in a future relationship.

5. Tell your friends and family members about the breakup. Not only will they be able to offer support for your decision, but they can run interference between you and your ex should he pursue you.

6. Cut off all modes of contact if your boyfriend will not leave you alone, including e-mail, text messaging and phone calls. If necessary, avoid public or private places where you know you may run into him. If you are being harassed, it may be necessary to call the authorities.

7. Seek help from a professional. Apart from either physical, verbal or mental abuse, the relationship may have also included some sort of betrayal, such as cheating or lying, or manipulation. Any and all of these things are difficult to deal with and you will benefit from professional counseling.

References

• I Want Closure: Are You In An Abusive Relationship?
• Love Is Respect.org: Breaking Up
• Recovery Man: Abusive Relationships