How to Handle Conflicts and Problems
Conflicts and problems are situations in which a difference in opinions, methods, and feelings has the potential to result in difficulty for those involved. Such issues can occur within friendships, families, at the workplace, or at school. Being able to handle conflicts and problems and attempt to resolve them is an important skill to learn given that they are part of our everyday lives and there is no way to completely avoid them. The more practice you have dealing with such situations, the better you will be at handling them in the future.
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Instructions
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Identify the main issue of the conflict or problem. Sometimes, you may be upset about something, but you are unsure what the true issue is. Therefore, it is necessary for you to analyze the tension and find the source of the problem. For example, you may be working on a project with a friend, but he is upset that you are not putting enough work into it.
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Meet the conflict or problem head-on and don't avoid it. Arrange a time and place to meet with your friend to discuss the problem. When handling such matters, it is best to meet in a private place. For example, you and your friend may agree to meet at your house.
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Tell your friend how you are feeling. Do not directly blame your friend, or make him feel as if the entire problem is his fault. This will only make the conflict worse. By stating your own feelings, you will help your friend to reveal his own feelings. For example, you may state that you want to contribute to the project, but you are confused about the subject matter and every time you do something, your friend seems to take over.
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Allow your friend to explain his perspective. With every conflict, there is always more than one point of view. Reaching an agreement is easier when each of you state your position on the issue. Do not interrupt the other person when he is speaking. For example, your friend may state that he tried to give you some responsibility with the project, yet you failed to perform even the simplest of tasks. He was upset that he had to do extra work in addition to the mistakes of yours that he had to fix.
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Inquire about specific parts of the problem. When you handle conflicts and problems, do not be afraid to ask open-ended questions. For example, you may ask your friend to describe a task that you did not perform accurately. He may ask you to provide an example about how he displayed that he was unsatisfied with your work.
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Arrive at a solution to the problem. By providing advice to your friend, and having him provide advice to you, it will be easier for both of you to reach an agreement. For example, by explaining that you did not understand the subject material for the project, he may be more willing to help you rather than become upset about you not doing the tasks properly. To solve the problem, he will spend more time on each of the parts of the project with you, rather than having you complete tasks alone that you do not fully understand.
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Follow up on whether the resolution was successful. Sometimes, you may need to have another discussion to make sure the problem has been fixed. For example, both you and your friend may agree that performing the tasks together helps to get the work done more efficiently. It also helps you to better understand the subject material.
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References
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