How to Deal With a Friend Being Manipulated

Talking about this issue with your friend requires sensitivity.

Everyone wants the best for their friends, and it can be painful to see the people you care about being taken advantage of or manipulated. While it's possible to ignore the situation, you might feel motivated to intervene and help your friend break free of the manipulation; this can be a delicate and sensitive issue, and as such it requires a great deal of tact within its approach. However, if your efforts are successful, your friend could be freed from an emotionally unhealthy situation.

Instructions

1. Decide whether advice is appropriate. Unsolicited advice is notorious for causing arguments and conflict among friends, as your advice might be interpreted as judgment on your friend's life. You should carefully weigh-up the likelihood of whether your friend would appreciate your advice or take offense to it.

2. Understand the risks this might have to your friendship. If your friend is in a romantic relationship with the manipulative person, you could be creating a situation where your friend feels the need to choose "one or the other" to remain in contact with. This can be made more likely if the manipulative person has a great deal of influence over your friend's decisions.

3. Tell your friend that you're concerned about her. Explain matter-of-factly the instances and events that have caused you to worry about your friend's relationship with the manipulative person. Explain that you're not judging your friend's behavior, but you feel it's your duty as a friend to express your opinion.

4. Encourage your friend to take positive steps to recognize when she's being manipulated. This involves noticing when the other person uses guilt to his advantage, or has an unhealthy level of influence within your friend's life and activities.

5. Support your friend in whatever decision she makes. If your friend decides to continue the relationship, acknowledge her decision and don't attempt to undermine it. Likewise, if she decides to take action, offer her time and assistance to help her do so.

References

• The Friendship Cafe: Advice Between Best Friends
• Sheer Balance: 6 Steps to Stop Being Manipulated