How to Deal With Being Gossiped About

Gossip gets worse with each person who repeats it.

Discovering that you are being gossiped about is troubling. Whether the rumors are true or not, someone has decided to take an interest in the goings on in your life and to share that information with others. Now, you have to take steps to deal with it. Gossip that is untrue or hurtful can affect your job, your relationships and even your self esteem. Knowing what to do should the situation arise, will help you to minimize or eliminate the effects of gossip.

Instructions

1. Remain calm and refrain from retaliation. Using rumors of your own to discredit gossip about you is not an effective solution. This will only give more attention to the gossip and make people talk about you more.

2. Deal with the gossip head on, especially if the rumors are untrue or hurtful. Employ your friends and family to address the gossip and discredit it by offering information that is true about you or evidence that it is untrue. By putting good information out there you counterbalance the untrue gossip.

3. Notify your employer of the gossip if it is occurring in your workplace. You don't want false information to get back to your boss without your having given him the heads up. If your employer hears from you first, he will have a chance to come to his own conclusion instead of relying on the gossip. If you are in school, talk to a counselor or teacher about it.

4. Ignore the gossip if you determine it is superficial and won't affect other areas of your life. A rumor claiming that you sleep with your mouth open is probably not a big deal in comparison to gossip accusing you of doing drugs.

5. Keep your private life private. Don't talk about your personal life at work or at school. If you are freely providing information to potential gossipers, they have the ammunition they need to spread that information. From there they can add any details that they'd like, creating gossip as they go.

Tips & Warnings

• If gossip is making you feel depressed, contact a counselor or talk to your doctor for help.

• If gossip is making you think about hurting yourself or someone else, seek professional help immediately.

References

• Time Health: Q&A: How to Combat Gossip; Jeremy Caplan; September, 2008
• Florida International University; Facing Down Workplace Gossip; Robert Bacal

Resources

• PBS Kids Go!; Its My Life; Gossip and Rumors: Breaking the Chain