How to Forgive a Relative Who Won't Apologize or Admit Mistakes
One of the major goals of forgiveness is to begin healing damaged relationships. Forgiveness doesn't involve condoning or excusing the offensive behavior but provides release from anger and resentment for the person who was harmed. Forgiveness can be particularly difficult when dealing with relatives or people who refuse to apologize or admit mistakes.
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Instructions
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Writing in a journal or diary offers a private space to explore feelings of hurt or anger. Write in a journal or diary about feelings of anger and hurt, and working toward releasing the anger toward the relative who offended. Acknowledge that forgiveness doesn't require that the other person admit her part in the rift.
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Prayer provides hope and support from a higher power. Find a private place to pray. When praying, seek forgiveness for the person who caused harm as well as praying for help to release the anger and resentment related to the situation. Prayer can be simple requests for assistance or may be more complex and include petitions for change in the family member who caused the pain.
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Meditation taps into inner serenity and peace. Use a guided meditation to focus on releasing anger and replacing it with feelings of peace and harmony. Find and use images that help visualize release. Examples of forgiveness images include a river flowing away or a balloon floating up into the sky. Imagine a boat on the river or the balloon holding the anger and resentment and carrying it away.
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Counseling helps to work through difficult emotions and situations. Seek counseling. Talk to a counselor or pastor who can help examine emotions surrounding forgiving a relative who isn't willing to accept responsibility for his actions. Counselors help clients find resolution on past hurts as well as prepare for future interactions with family members.
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References
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Comments
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I had that same problem not with a relative but with a friend of my mother's who had me wrapped around her fingers when my mother was dying. She decided who my friends should be, what I should wear, what I should do--even what music I should listen to (she liked elevator music and wanted me to listen to it as well instead of classical music which was too good for her). Nothing would make her happy. She picked on me for being fat. Even her teasing was a way of tearing me down. I finally lost weight and cut off all contact with the old bag. When I heard that this so-called friend died, I celebrated!
