How to Behave at a Business Dinner

Sometimes these dinners are dull and stuffy. Sometimes they are nights of drunken gluttony. No matter what type of business meeting you may be a part of, here are some rules to guide you across this tightrope of professional dining.

Difficulty:

Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Eat. The purpose of the dinner is to partake of a meal with colleagues of some sort. They are probably hungry, too. Everyone will feel better and more comfortable without empty stomachs.

2. Mind your manners. This should be obvious, but remember what your parents told you: don't chew with your mouth open, don't reach across the table, don't rock back in your chair and don't speak with your mouth full.

3. The waiter will either go around the table to take orders, or ask the ladies at the table for their orders first. Unless there is hesitation or confusion over who will order first, there is no need to blurt out your order. Take your turn.

4. Depending on your dinner guests, alcohol may be inappropriate, appropriate or expected. If it is inappropriate, don't order it. If it's appropriate, order one drink with dinner. If heavier drinking is expected, work with your comfort level.

5. Order a drink and pretend to sip at it or order something nonalcoholic if alcohol is expected and you do not drink.

6. Engage in harmless talk to get people warmed up if conversation is quiet, stilted or difficult to begin. You can discuss the atmosphere of the restaurant, traffic getting to the restaurant, the parking situation or the route to the restaurant.

7. Keep your meal choice reasonable if you are not picking up the tab. Don't order the most expensive item on the menu unless you are at a modestly priced restaurant.

8. Let your colleagues know that it is okay to order the most expensive thing on the menu if you are paying for the meal by saying something like: "The filet looks wonderful. I think I might have that. Does anyone else like filet? If you do, you should get it. I hear that it's amazing here."

9. Tell the waiter to bring you the check before the meal is over in the above situation. Do this discreetly.

10. Keep to the topics at hand if the dinner is to discuss business. If it's for a relaxing evening of camaraderie, ask your colleagues about themselves-where they went to school, their kids, their favorite sports teams, favorite bands, favorite movies, favorite books, their travels or their hobbies and interests. People love to talk about themselves, so let them talk!

Tips & Warnings

• If the peer pressure to drink is enormous, excuse yourself to the facilities and on the way ask your waiter to bring you a virgin cocktail (without announcing its virgin status). When you return from the facilities, you can casually mention that you caught the waiter and asked for a drink.

• Unless it is expected that you drink to excess, be mindful of your alcohol intake. Remember, this remains business and you must be able to control your judgement.