How to Cope With Someone That Is Judgmental

Avoid arguing with judgmental people.

Dealing with judgmental personalities can be a difficult and frustrating experience. People who are overly critical and pass judgment on others like to be in control of situations and do so by putting others down. These people usually enjoy the negative attention it gets them, making them unlikely to discontinue their behavior. Remember to keep your cool when dealing with judgmental people to avoid escalating the problem.

Instructions

1. Don't appear to take offense. Even if the judgmental comments are unwarranted and offensive, try to hide your frustration. Judgmental individuals often take pleasure in getting a reaction out of you and taking offense will only encourage them. Stay calm no matter what the situation.

2. Remember your own worth. Judgments passed by others can shake your self-confidence and make you doubt your skills and abilities. Remember that the criticisms of judgmental people are not reflective of your talents and your worth as an employee, a friend or a person.

3. Learn to laugh things off. Developing a sense of humor in situations with judgmental people will help you to not take their criticisms to heart.

4. Don't try to change a judgmental person. Judgmental people are typically very set in their beliefs and opinions of others. Contradicting their judgments will only cause you additional frustration. If a they are making very unfair criticisms of your friends, try pointing out your friends' good qualities without getting defensive or combative.

5. Recognize that judgmental people frequently struggle with insecurities of their own. Their judgmental nature may be a manifestation of poor self-esteem or other personal issues. By judging others they draw attention away from their own short-comings, often not realizing that their comments are alienating people and pushing them away.

Tips & Warnings

• If the judgmental person is your employer or supervisor, consider seeking employment in a more positive environment.

References

• Dr. Les Carter: Anxiety and Judgemental People
• How to Deal with Annoying People; Bob Phillips, Kimberly Alyn; 1984