We reiterate: Never lie on a résumé. Neither should you exaggerate, embellish, distort or do anything else that our thesaurus picked out as being synonymous with "bullshit." There are several problems with lying on a résumé, with the biggest problem being that it's immoral. But for those of you without Jiminy Crickets, consider that, if a lie is ever discovered, you will most likely be fired immediately, and your nose will grow. And besides, you can make the stuff that you have done sound so good that you won't need to lie. To make your stuff sound good, adopt three strategies:
Write action-oriented sentences
This means you should make your previous experiences sound as proactive as possible. Make it sound like you solved problems, achieved goals and accomplished tasks. One of the most common résumé blunders is to describe a work experience as follows: "Responsibilities included: filing, answering phones, copying." At all costs, stay away from "responsibilities included" statements. Instead, set up a problem that existed, and say how you solved it. For example: "Raised $20,000 in funding, a 400 percent increase from the previous year." This description makes it sound like you actually did stuff, and shows that you solved a problem.
The following is a list of action-oriented verbs:
accomplish achieve acquire adapt administer analyze assemble balance budget collaborate compile composed conduct coordinate communicate compile conduct contribute complete create delegate design develop direct double edit engage establish evaluate expand forecast found generate implement improve insure interpret increase initiate instruct invent lead maintain manage motivate negotiate operate organize oversee participate perform present plan produce promote propose provide publish recruit reorganize research review select solve supervise survey support teach train travel
Notice how these words also imply action. Notice how passive words like "do" are not included. These words above help you sell yourself. If you're talking about a job you still have, use the present tense. If it's a job you've left, use the past tense.
It bears repeating: The best way to sell yourself is to describe your employment history in a "problem/solution" format, in which you state both what the problem was before you entered, and how you fixed the problem. This type of critical thinking is the most sought-after quality by employers.
Use details
Nothing impresses people like details. Don't just say, "Raised money"; say, "Raised over $2,400." The more details you use, the more legitimate a candidate you seem to be, because (1) people remember details more than general statements; and (2) details lend credibility. So always be as detailed as possible without getting wordy.
Recognize your talents
Finally, you must realize that you've done a lot of stuff in your life, and if you think about it, you've gained a lot of useful skills. Projectile nose-blowing doesn't count, as useful as it may be, but you've also accomplished many things that employers really want. Were you a Residential Assistant in college? That means you may have conducted meetings, organized activities for large audiences, coordinated events, communicated with students, and responded to needs that you recognized. Don't just say "Residential Assistant: In charge of college students if they had problems." Instead, think about the stuff you did do, like "Residential Assistant: Organized and implemented weekly activity sessions for over 100 college freshmen." See how that at least makes it sound like you did stuff? Here's another example:
Salesperson, Gap Clothing Store, Los Angeles, California (Summer 1995). Assisted clients with selections of clothing, developed and promoted special marketing events, trained new employees, monitored cash. Store increased in sales by 7 percent in 6-month period.
Sell yourself. Your résumé is going to be read by a person, so if you're not impressed, she won't be impressed, either.
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