If you received numerous lumps of coal last Christmas, your family and friends may be trying to tell you that the gifts you've been giving them on their birthdays and holidays leave a lot to be desired. Rather than punish yourself for being tasteless, thoughtless, and cheap, realize that it's more likely you are merely confused and need some help in picking out the perfect gifts for your family and friends. What you need is a crib sheet on how to shop, what to buy and what not to buy.
The point of gift-giving is to show that you care, so if it's obvious that you haven't put any thought into the gift at all, there's no point in giving it.
"So how do I find out what these people want?" you ask. Consider the following tactics:
1. Listen to the recipient. The next time the two of you are watching TV, make a note of all of the things he gets excited about during commercials. Or pay attention when you are window-shopping together, or even when you're just chatting. People are always unconsciously rambling about stuff they want, and if you make it a point to listen closely, your job of finding out what he would like will be greatly simplified.
2. Ask someone close to the recipient. If you're not usually around to listen to her talk about the stuff she wants, call up someone who is--like her best friend, or a sibling or parent--and ask for a detailed list. They can usually at least lead you at least in the right direction.
3. Ask the recipient. Some people don't mind if you directly ask them what they'd like for a present. But ask only if you think the recipient will be comfortable about responding.
And don't forget: Those who claim that they "will love anything you get them" or "only want your company" or "don't want anything" are usually lying. Get them what you know they want through your research--be it an omelet pan or French comprehensive tapes--and they'll love you for it.
