- The trust that needs to exist between two people to build and maintain a relationship is damaged once there has been abuse. Regardless of whether the abuse was physical or emotional, the trust that existed in the relationship is broken. If the abuse was a single episode, the people involved may be able to work through the broken trust and rebuild it, leaving little permanent damage. However, it is uncommon for abuse to occur as a single episode. Therefore, the abuse victim's future ability to trust will be permanently damaged. People who try to develop any type of relationship with the abuse victim in the future may have to prove that they are trustworthy many times before being accepted as a friend or more. Children who are removed from an abusive situation may have difficulty attaching to and trusting a new family. Many are diagnosed with attachment disorders such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and reactive attachment disorder (RAD).
- Once a person has suffered from abuse, any type of affection offered becomes suspect. This is especially true when the affection is coming from the abuser. However, if the victim suffered repeated abuse, any attempted affection offered in future relationships, may be met with resistance and distrust. Unfortunately, sincere affection giving in friendship, such as a hug and endearing words, may trigger flashbacks of the abuse. Victims of severe abuse struggle with maintaining long-term relationships, and their divorce and breakup rates are high. Some victims choose alternative lifestyles resulting from their inability to accept affection from someone who reminds them of their abuser.
- When a person has suffered from abuse, it is quite common for that person to develop compulsive disorders that are based on anxiety. Compulsive behaviors tend to have a soothing effect on abuse victims, but they can be annoying to a loved one in the relationship. One individual may use a variety of compulsive behaviors to soothe and take control of their anxiety in situations. Some examples include developing tics, excessive licking, chewing pencils or arranging items in specific patterns. You may observe people with obsessive-compulsive disorder who need everything arranged in proper order organizing the food on their plate, organizing their socks by color, even rearranging items on shelves at the grocery store. These behaviors can seem crazy to individuals that the abuse victim is trying to have a relationship with, sometimes causing relationships to end abruptly. Anxiety attacks caused by flashbacks of abuse may cause victims to hyperventilate decades after the abuse occurred. These attacks can be scary and disturbing for the abuse victim and loved ones who witness them.
