- Laws regarding child custody are specific to the state of residence in the U.S., although some similarities exist between the states. Some couples agree on shared custody of the children, which can mean joint legal custody, joint physical custody or both. If the court with jurisdiction over the case approves this arrangement, the parents may be able to divide the physical custody of the children evenly. However, in order for physical custody time to be equal, the parents must live in relatively close proximity, especially for school-aged children. Obviously, the children cannot change schools every other week while living with their other parent. Therefore, shared custody usually refers to joint legal custody and each parent's equal rights to make decisions for their children's upbringing. Usually, one parent has physical custody of the children more of the time than the other parent, even with shared custody. Therefore, the address of the parent with more physical custody may determine where the children go to school, what doctors they see and where they play sports. However, with joint legal custody both parents must agree on these choices; so sometimes a private school and alternate activities need to be arranged. Children's schedules are bound to be full with shared custody.
- Regular visits usually occur with shared custody. Very young children may be able to spend one week at each parent's home if they are close enough together so that physical custody is shared equally. When parents live farther apart, some children live six months with each parent and actually change schools halfway through each school year. As academics increase with age, this option can make successful learning very difficult. Older children struggle with this type of custody arrangement as their friends become a major part of their lives and they want to spend more time with them. Most parents, even though they have shared custody, follow the more typical visitation arrangement of every weekend or every other weekend, every other holiday and several weeks during school breaks. However, each case is a little different depending on parents' lifestyles, work schedules and the distance between the separated parents' houses. Adjusting to limited contact with extended family members can be difficult for children who had significant relationships with grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.
- Shared custody usually means that parents have joint legal custody in making decisions for the upbringing of their children. Therefore, parents should discuss changes that affect the children before implementing them. Both parents should agree upon making a change in religious affiliation or schools attended. Both parents should make decisions for non-emergency procedures, counseling or therapy, and split out-of-pocket costs evenly. While courts do not assess fines to parents for noncompliance in joint decision making at this time, you may have to pay legal fees to battle these issues out in court.
