The Reluctant Athlete: Keeping Your Daughter in Sports
What's behind the drop in middle-school girls' sports participation -- and what parents can do.
You learn to be a good leader and about being prompt. We have found that more than 80 percent of women Fortune 500 CEOs participated in sports.
— Cicely Gay, national director of education and alliance at Women’s Sports Foundation
Although your daughter may have happily played on a soccer or softball team in grade school, now in middle school sports are “no longer fun” and she seems obsessed with her looks instead. She isn't alone: Research from Women's Sports Foundation reports that beginning in middle school and through high school, girls experience a 23 percent decline in sports participation, compared to 10 percent for boys. In addition, a report released by the Girl Scout Research Institute reported that 40 percent of girls age 11 to 17 whom they surveyed said they don’t participate in sports because they don’t feel skilled or competent, and 23 percent don’t participate because they feel they don’t look good doing so.
The Benefits of Exercise
Girls have made monumental strides in participating in sports, largely because of the passage of Title IX in 1972, which mandated equal access for males and females to educational programs and services -- including sports programs -- in schools receiving federal funds. According to Women’s Sports Foundation, the rate of girls’ participation in sports has gone from 1 in 27 in 1981, to 1 in 3 today.
While more elementary-school-age girls are participating in sports than ever before, middle school is when girls’ attitudes toward sports start to shift. Puberty can affect a girl’s desire to play sports in a big way. Social relationships with her peers begin to take on more importance, along with being noticed by boys. Girls at this age may start to feel that they won’t be considered attractive if they’re strong, fit and can outrun a boy.
“Unfortunately our society continues to place more emphasis on a girl’s appearance than her ability, which doesn’t help during this developmental stage,” said Kamla Modi, Ph.D., research and outreach analyst for the Girl Scouts Research Institute and former Division I gymnast at Rutgers University in Newark, New Jersey. “Being a star athlete doesn’t quite bring out a girl’s ‘feminine’ side unless it’s a performance sport, such as gymnastics, figure skating or cheerleading. Boys, on the other hand, are socialized to do sports at an early age. Sports are masculine by nature, and boys doing sports does not compete with boys getting attention and being well-liked. They go hand in hand.”
GoGirlGo!, a sports program for girls sponsored by Women’s Sports Foundation, works to “stop the drop” during the critical middle school years. The program works with schools and community organizations in Atlanta, Chicago, Boston, Seattle and, since June 2011, New York City.
One reason girls frequently cite for dropping out is that sports are increasingly viewed as more competitive and less fun. Candice Dixon, National Program Manager of the GoGirlGo! program, attributes this view to a cultural bias toward boys and sports. “In their early birthdays, boys receive sports equipment and clothing for birthday presents, while girls receive a doll,” she said. “Girls aren’t encouraged to be as competitive as boys. When they get to middle school, girls will choose other activities over sports because it hasn’t become part of their identity.”
Girls who continue to participate in sports say that it helps them stay in shape, while boys at this age cite the improvement in their athletic skills as the main benefit, notes Dr. Keith Zullig, who teaches community medicine at West Virginia University and, along with Rebecca White, wrote the article “Physical activity, life satisfaction, and self-rated health of middle school students,” which appeared in the journal "Applied Research in Quality of Life." “Girls may find the activity less important in a direct sense as they become older, and parents could be putting less emphasis on it,” said Zullig.
Participation in sports activities has been shown to be instrumental in helping girls be healthier and happier. “They are physically healthier,” said Modi. “They feel better about their bodies and have better self-esteem.” This helps girls to better resist the pressures to fit in and be noticed solely for their appearance, she notes.
Modi, who began training as a gymnast at age 4, recalled how valuable the support of her fellow gymnasts was in giving her a sense of identity. “Even if I didn’t fit in with the girls at school, I always had the friendship of the other gymnasts. I always had a place.”
Esmeralda Negron is an assistant coach of Princeton University’s women’s soccer team, which she led to the NCAA College Cup semifinals as a student in 2004. Santiago was named the No. 2 female athlete at Princeton in the last decade. She said she feels the physical benefits of sports participation would be a strong incentive to girls. “When you’re playing sports, you’re a lot fitter. I think girls would want to feel good and feel shapely. It’s empowering to be strong and succeed in some sort of athletics.”
Dan Saferstein, a psychologist who works with families, teams and coaches, says sports can help girls develop resilience. “You develop a certain discipline, a certain perseverance. You get your heart broken, but you learn to heal and bounce back. It teaches you to cope with things that aren’t easy, that not everything goes your way.”
“There are definite transferable skills,” said Cicely Gay, national director of education and alliance at Women’s Sports Foundation. “You learn to be a good leader and about being prompt. We have found that more than 80 percent of women Fortune 500 CEOs participated in sports."
Taking your daughter to women’s sports events will help her see the larger picture of women’s athletics. “There are a lot of amazing women athletes, such as Maria Sharapova and the women of the WNBA,” said Negron. “Trust the empowerment of athletics. Remind girls of their role models.”
Changing the Game
Parents can encourage their daughter to try a different sport or activity such as running, bicycling, aerobics, inline skating, skateboarding or dance.
In addition, parents can find a physical activity the family can participate in together. Since a girl may worry about her lack of knowledge of a sport, find a sports clinic for girls that can help teach the requisite skills.
“Try and identify what it is your daughter isn’t getting from her sports experience anymore,” said Modi. “Sports aren’t automatically perfect for every person. So it’s important to make a good fit between the sports experience and your child. You may want to consider trying a different sports club where you could get a fresh start at a new coach with a new group of girls. You may even want to consider trying a new sport. There are a ton of sports out there that have different tracks such as recreational or competitive, year round or seasonal, and characteristics including team, individual, contact or performance."
While it’s important to teach your daughter the value of keeping a commitment, pushing her to stay in a sport activity she’s not happy with can backfire.
“It may be a good idea to take some time off from the sport and consider trying it again in a year or two. Just the way women like to work out with a friend, girls like doing sports with their friends," Modi said. "The supportive teammate environment in sports has the potential to be very strong and long lasting.”
- Photo Credit Jupiterimages/Comstock/Getty Images
Resources
- Girl Scout Research Institute: The New Normal? What Girls Say About Healthy Living
- Women’s Sport Foundation: Her Life Depends on It II
- Applied Research in Quality of Life; Physical activity, life satisfaction, and self-rated health of middle school students; K. J. Zullig, et al.
- Win or Lose: A Guide to Sports Parenting; Dan Saferstein, Ph.D.
