7 Ways Romance Changes After Having Kids

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August is Romance Awareness Month! So we’re dimming the lights, cracking open the wine and sighing to our spouse: “Remember how romantic we were before kids?”

Yes, children add many wonderful dimensions to our lives, but enhanced romance isn’t exactly one of them.

So, how does the language of love change after having kids? Here are 7 ways.

SEVEN
BEFORE KIDS: Husband surprises you by handing you a bouquet of flowers.
AFTER KIDS: Husband surprises you by handing you a baby with a dirty diaper.

SIX
BEFORE: Dinner at an Italian bistro, followed by a movie at the theater.
AFTER: Leftovers, followed by half a Pay-Per-View movie before falling asleep.

FIVE
BEFORE: Silk pajamas at bedtime.
AFTER: Whatever doesn’t have spit-up, juice or kids’ toothpaste on it.

FOUR
BEFORE: A picnic while watching an orchestra concert at the park.
AFTER: A handful of goldfish crackers while pushing the kids on the swings at the park.

THREE
BEFORE: Hours of uninterrupted conversation about your lives.
AFTER: Thirty seconds of discussion about your days before a kid interjects, “MOM!  HE HIT MY BUTT WITH A LIGHTSABER!”

TWO
BEFORE: A spur-of-the-moment trip to Cabo for the weekend.
AFTER: A spur-of-the-moment…nothing.  Even a date at the Olive Garden requires a week of planning and hunting down a babysitter.

ONE
BEFORE: Holding hands down the street.
AFTER: Screaming at the kids, “HOLD OUR HANDS BEFORE YOU CROSS THE STREET!”

Next time your kid whines about the lightsaber injury inflicted by his sibling, be sure to turn to your spouse and smile, “Happy Romance Awareness Month!”

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