Woo-hoo! It’s summer. You know what that means: time for the ice cream truck to make its neighborhood rounds. Heady with the promise of warm, fun days ahead, you are only more than happy to oblige when the kids hear that bell and beg for a Creamsicle — the first time. But we all know that will be far from the last time the ice cream truck will invade your neighborhood. In fact, by the time August rolls around, the truck’s music will have seemingly devolved from a delightful ditty into a siren of impending doom: “I AM HERE TO TURN YOUR KIDS INTO WHINY MESSES, SPOIL THEIR APPETITES AND TAKE YOUR MONEY AGAIN! BWA-HA-HAAAA!”
If you get tired of that darn truck targeting your kids — and even more tired of saying, “No” — then I have just the thing for you:
THE 6 BEST EXCUSES FOR AVOIDING THE ICE CREAM TRUCK THIS SUMMER
(6) Feign ignorance and insist that it’s really a musical garbage truck. (In your defense, most of the food on the truck does have the same nutritional value as garbage.)
(5) Distract them with ice cream from your freezer. Sure, it will still ruin dinner and bore holes in their teeth, but at least you won’t need to take out a second mortgage just to afford yet another King Cone.
(4) Use your, um, advancing age to your advantage: “What’s that, kids? You say there’s a screaming duck outside? My hearing’s not so good today…”
(3) Claim that the truck is a mobile dentist’s office — and they’re displaying the sweets as evil examples of cavity-inducers.
(2) Break out an oldie-but-goodie: “Sorry, no money right now.”
(1) Tell your kids that the truck only plays music when it’s OUT of ice cream.
Hey, sometimes surviving parenthood requires employing “creativity.”