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Super Bowl Jelly Shots: Failure and Recovery

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I decided to try my hand at making jelly shots for the Super Bowl. I don’t like football, and I don’t like gelatin. But I do like liquor, so I was willing to overlook the first two dislikes.

The Inspiration

Whilst scouring the Interwebz, I found these football helmet jelly shots from a blog called High/Low Food/Drink. Oh boy. I can totally make those. I am a culinary genius. A few days later, I was the proud owner of five football helmet molds, ordered from the vast abyss known as eBay. Next stop was the grocery store.

The Ingredients

For my jelly shots, I bought:

  • Berry blue Jell-O mix
  • Orange Jell-O mix
  • Lime Jell-O mix
  • Triple sec liqueur
  • Blue Curacao liqueur
  • Sour apple liqueur
  • Sweet condensed milk (not pictured)
  • You’ll also notice the mini plastic shot glasses (“Lifesaver”) and the football helmet molds (“Bane of my existence.”) More on those later.

Making the jelly shots is simple. I’m going to save you the utter disappointment of being a total culinary failure trouble and ONLY give instructions for making the mini shot glass jelly shots.

The Recipe

  1. Start with the Denver Broncos blue layer. Boil one cup water in a saucepan. Add 3 ounces blue Jell-O mix, and stir until dissolved. Remove from heat and stir occasionally until it’s cooled down.
  2. Add one cup Blue Curacao liqueur to the blue mixture. Stir. Spoon the mixture into half of the mini plastic shot glasses, filling halfway.
  3. To make the Seattle Seahawks blue layer, add a bit of sweetened condensed milk to the remaining blue mixture. Stir until completely mixed, resulting in a lighter blue. Spoon the mixture into the rest of the mini plastic shot glasses, filling halfway.
  4. Refrigerate all of the half-filled shots. Wait two hours for the shots to firm up.
  5. Make the orange and lime layers by halving the recipe. For the orange layer, use 1/2 cup boiling water, 1.5 ounces orange Jell-O mix and 1/2 cup triple sec liqueur. Follow the same instructions, then spoon the mixture on top of the dark blue jelly shots.
  6. For the green layer, use 1/2 cup boiling water, 1.5 ounces lime Jell-O mix, and 1/2 cup sour apple liqueur. Spoon the mixture on top of the light blue jelly shots.
  7. Refrigerate again until firm, then serve.

These are glorious, right?

The Fail

You know what’s NOT glorious? These. Ladies and gentlemen, I present football helmet jelly shot failure:

I call them “blobs on top of larger blobs.” eHow Tech Director Dave Johnson said they looked like snails. We can all agree that football helmets, they are not.

Want to feel even better about your culinary superiority over me? Here’s another glamour shot of my failure. From this angle, they look kind of like Volkswagen Beetles. Vundabar!

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