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Download an Oscar Ballot and Predict the 2014 Academy Award Winners

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The Academy Awards—my Super Bowl. The day I spend watching all six pre-game hours of red carpet rhetoric, then dissect and analyze the entire ceremony with hysterical play-by-play commentary with friends. The best part? Predicting the winners—I’m decent at it—I average about .500. I posted a full-size copy of this year’s ballot down below so just click on both pages, right click and print.

My predictions (below after the first ballot…)


2014 Academy Awards Tip Sheet

Best Picture:
I’d love to see something as bizarre as Her win, but 12 Years a Slave takes this one because the Academy loves a gritty, true story.

Best Director:
David O. Russell will win for American Hustle because of a heavily split vote.

Best Actor:
McConaughey has been doing some outstanding work the last couple of years and he was flawless in Buyers Club, but I’m going with Bruce Dern. Keep moving, DiCaprio.

Best Actress:
Either Amy Adams (full disclosure: I have been to a recent Prince concert with her) or Sandra Bullock would win this one if the Academy awarded for big box office bait, but the group has been giving wins to layered, introspective roles. Cate Blanchett wins.

Best Supporting Actor:
Fassbender is fashionable in some circles at the moment, but Leto has had buzz from day one.

Best Supporting Actress:
America’s current sweetheart (once Bullock, now Jennifer Lawrence) will not win—she was miscast. Lupita Nyong’o takes this one.

Best Foreign Language Film:
Doesn’t matter—just know you’re going to get a heartfelt underdog acceptance speech from a flustered pair of foreign movie makers that are just excited to be there.

Best Adapted Screenplay:
The Wolf of Wall Street will win one award and this will be it.

Best Original Screenplay:
I’m taking a risk by calling Her, but the safe bet is Nebraska.

Best Animated Feature Film:
As a parent with a 6-year-old, I saw ‘em all. Frozen will win everything it’s nominated for.

Best Make-up and Hair:
How was American Hustle not nominated in this category? Bad Grandpa for the shocking win.

Best Costume Design:
Did you see the clothes Amy Adams wore? Please—American Hustle.

Best Visual Effects:
Gravity will win its only Oscar here.

Best Doc, Feature:
Doesn’t matter because the show producer will play the winners off mid-speech anyway and it’ll only make us feel terrible.

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