Russian Marriage Traditions
Russian weddings are occasions of much celebration. The civil ceremony itself is quite brief, but the wedding reception can last for two days. The official governmental stance on marriage is that it is merely the establishing of a new socialist family and should therefore be free of religious and superstitious overtones. To the participants, though, it is a joyous celebration of the love between two people, to be observed with as many rituals and traditions as possible.
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ZAGS
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Russian couples do not observe long engagements. As soon as the proposal has been accepted, the couple goes to the Zapis Aktov Grazhdanskogo Sostoyaniya (ZAGS), which is the Department of Registration of Civil Statuses. Here they fill out an application to register as a married couple. They may also book photographers, musicians or other service providers for the ceremony. There is a minimum of a one-month waiting period before the registration ceremony can be performed, so some couples line up to do “night duty” outside the ZAGS office the night before in order to be first in line 30 days before their chosen wedding month.
The Ransom
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There are no wedding attendants or processionals as there are in Western weddings. The best friends of the couple are called "svideteli," or “witnesses,” and it is their job to develop a series of tests for the bridegroom. Traditionally, he picks up the bride at her home on the way to the registry ceremony, and the svideteli set up a roadblock on each stairwell or hallway and demand that he “ransom his bride,” according to the Passport Moscow website. Usually, he must perform such feats as answering questions about the bride's favorite color or pick out her lipstick print from among many others. If he guesses wrong, he must bribe the witnesses to pass.
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Brakosochetanie
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The official wedding ceremony is called the "brakosochetanie." It is purely a civil ceremony and, if the couple is planning a big church ceremony, the registry signing may happen days or even weeks before the wedding. The brakosochetanie takes place in the ZAGS office or a special "Palace of Marriage." Only the closest friends and immediate family attend the actual registration ceremony, usually arriving in a caravan of highly decorated cars. The ceremony itself is brief. The couple exchanges vows and rings and signs the registry. Marriage officials take a refresher course at a drama school each year to ensure that they can conduct a moving registration ceremony.
Progulka
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After the ceremony, members of the wedding party return to their cars and embark on a progulka, or tour of the city. They visit historical sites and the couple leaves flowers on war heroes' graves to symbolize gratitude for their sacrifices. Many couples also release doves or butterflies to symbolize the beginning of their new life together. According to Natasha Dmitrieva of “Russian Life,” in some parts of Russia, the bride will tie a pink ribbon to her dove and the bridegroom will tie a blue one to his. They will release the doves simultaneously, and the color on the dove who flies the highest will predict the sex of their first child.
The Feast
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After the progulka, the wedding party heads to a reception hall for the feast, which consists of two days of eating, drinking, singing and dancing. The couple may take bites out of a loaf of bread—the one who takes the biggest bite is said to be the one who will rule the household. The tamada, or master of ceremonies, welcomes the guests and leads the toasts. After each toast, the guests may chant, “Gor-ko! Gor-ko!” Gorko is the Russian word for “bitter,” according to the Russian Language for Lovers website, and means the champagne is bitter and the newlyweds must kiss for as long as possible to sweeten the wine.
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References
- Photo Credit an orthodox church of russia image by Yuri Bichkov from Fotolia.com
