Guest List Etiquette for a Church Wedding
The wedding day can be a wonderful celebration of love and commitment. Sharing it with family and friends in the presence of God is important to many couples and yet the myriad hoops the bride and groom must jump through on their way to the altar can be daunting. Adhering to proper wedding etiquette to ensure no one on either side of the family is offended is a key component to a successful day. And the subject which is perhaps fraught with the most pitfalls is the guest list.
Other People Are Reading
-
The Church and the Reception
-
While inviting some guests to the ceremony but not the reception may sound like a way of including more people in the big day, it is a big mistake. Even with the realities of hall size limitations and budget constraints, a church-only guest will likely feel as if he were good enough to watch the nuptials and offer a gift, but not quite A-list enough to garner an invite to the fun part.
Equal Numbers
-
Regardless of who is footing the bill, proper etiquette insists that both the bride and groom are given equal invitation opportunities. Only when they can't reach their allotment is it OK to tilt the invitation list to one side or the other.
-
Seating
-
Designated church seating is much easier than reception seating. The bride and groom each have their "side" and guests are generally asked upon arrival, "bride or groom?" The bride's family takes the left pews; the groom's family goes on the right. The parents of the bride and groom and the attendants occupy the first rows. The pews are then filled in with relatives and friends with a sense that those family and friends who are closest to the couple are seated at the front of the church, while those who know the couple less well sit toward the rear.
Co-Workers
-
Unless they each have a best friend or two at work, etiquette dictates an all-or-none policy with regard to the couple's co-workers. If it is a large company, including only their department is acceptable. Additionally, inviting the boss is considered a polite gesture, even if he and his wife are the only ones who get the nod.
Children
-
Excluding children from church weddings is entirely acceptable but should be clearly stated in the invitation. Directing an invitation to Mr. & Mrs. only should be sufficient. However, indicating the number of seats reserved or adding an "adult celebration" designation may not be a bad idea for large families with large broods.
Communication
-
If, for any reason, it becomes necessary to cancel or postpone the wedding, all of the guests should be notified in a timely manner. If it is too close to the actual ceremony, it may be necessary to enlist bridesmaids and groomsmen to work through the list by telephone.
-
References
- Photo Credit Wedding image by Przemyslaw Malkowski from Fotolia.com
