Wedding Guest Gift Etiquette
Weddings can be as stressful as they are celebratory, and not just for the bride and groom. Guests need to determine what to wear, what travel arrangements to make and what to give as a gift; all of these personal and financial decisions may leave you feeling confused and hopeless. Fortunately, the established etiquette of wedding gift-giving takes some of the load off by defining your options.
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Options
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The most universal rule of gift-giving at a wedding is to only give one of two things: an item from the registry or money. Almost all engaged couples complete a gift registry prior to their nuptials---this is essentially a list of things that they want or need from a particular store. Purchasing something from this list ensures that they will receive something they can use---fight the temptation to give a unique tchotchke or something handmade. Though this gesture may be from the heart, a wedding is not the appropriate time. Money, however, is perfectly acceptable.
Price Range
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Weddings are typically expensive for their guests, particularly if you are also attending engagement parties, bachelorette parties, bridal showers and other events. Unfortunately, this is not the time to go cheap---this is one of the biggest events in someone's life, and, whether you like it or not, you're expected to honor that event with a nice gift. Of course, spending within your budget is always proper etiquette---if you can't afford something lavish, you simply can't. Should that be the case, consider teaming up with other wedding guests to buy a group present.
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Give It On Time
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Though old traditions once dictated that giving your wedding gift within a year of the wedding was acceptable, that is no longer the case. With the advent of convenient online shopping and cheap, easy shipping methods, you no longer have an excuse to delay your wedding gift. The longer you wait, the more worried the couple may become that you either forgot or slighted them. Try to have your gift delivered no more than two months after the big day.
Don't Bring It
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Don't be fooled by the gift table at the reception; bringing your wedding gift to the wedding itself can be a major hassle for the bride and groom. Maybe the wedding is far from their home, or they don't have any way to transport their gifts at the end of the night. In any case, leave the gift at home on the big day. If you aren't sure where to send it, ask a member of the bridal party.
Get Personal
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Include a note with your gift congratulating the bride and groom. This is especially useful for assuaging any fears that the wine rack they registered for is an impersonal gift---write a little something to show just how happy you are, and it will be as cherished as whatever you bought for them.
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References
- Photo Credit wedding image by Mat Hayward from Fotolia.com
