Wedding Etiquette for the Bride & Groom
A bride and groom want to plan a wedding that is distinctly theirs, and rules of etiquette can help accomplish this while clarifying the process. The bride or groom's role in a traditional wedding may vary from those in a more modern scenario, but certain etiquette guidelines for the couple are relevant to all nuptials.
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Wedding Party
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etiquette guides a bride and groom to choose a wedding party based on their personal preferences The wedding party may consist of honor attendants--the best man and maid of honor--bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girls and ring bearers. While traditional etiquette says the number in the wedding party should relate to the level of formality in the ceremony, "Martha Stewart Weddings" suggests considering your personal preferences.
The fall 2005 issue notes that: "Eight to twelve is common, but you can have more or less. Many couples include children, often nieces and nephews. Others have honor attendants only....whatever you decide, don't feel you must choose an equal number of men and women."
The bride and groom should inform their wedding party of the date and time of the event as soon as the details are set.
Attire and costs
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Fit and finances are important when choosing a bridesmaid dress Weddings used to be only formal, but now the most important consideration for the bride and groom is to make sure they are dressed appropriately for their ceremony. When choosing the attire for the wedding party, figures and finances should be considered. Flattering fits and colors will go a long way in making the smiles in your pictures genuine, and the bride should remember that a bridesmaid's dress may only be worn once, so keeping it affordable or subsidizing the cost is appropriate. Similarly, if the groom opts for black tie and tuxedos need to be rented, it is good manners to offer to pay for them.
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Celebrations
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Long gone is the Victorian era, when a bride would literally be showered with small gifts from an opened parasol overhead. In modern times, a shower is a way for guests to provide the bride with items needed to set up house and may be hosted by the maid of honor, if she is not immediate family to the bride; the bridesmaids; or friends of the couple two to six weeks before the event. A modern shower may also include men, commonly referred to as a Jack and Jill Shower.
The bachelor or bachelorette parties are typically held two months to two weeks before the date of the nuptials. These events can celebrate the bride and groom as a couple, or individually and be in different locations. Each participant typically foots the bill for his own expenses, as well as chips in for the guest of honor.
Registry
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a bride and groom can register at as many stores as they feel they need The couple should register at stores that have many locations or are online, and choose items in a variety of price ranges. Etiquette does not dictate at how many stores a couple may register. A popular trend is for the the bride and groom to create distinctive interest registries, such as equipment for their hobbies. The registry location information is often posted to a wedding website or included with a shower invitation.
Thank You Notes
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Brides and grooms should send handwritten thank you notes Emily Post notes that "Thank you notes should be written within three months of the receipt of the gift. Ideally, a response should be written on the day you receive a wedding gift."
The bride and groom should hand-write and personalize each note. Each person who sent a present, hosted a party, participated in your wedding or helped in some way should receive a thank you note. Vendors that exceeded expectations may also receive a handwritten thank you.
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References
Resources
- Photo Credit bridal thank you image by Brett Mulcahy from Fotolia.com elegant bw bridal party flower bouquet with arms image by Paul Retherford from Fotolia.com bridesmaid and flowers blue image by Paul Retherford from Fotolia.com present image by Yekaterina Choupova from Fotolia.com silver thank you image by Brett Mulcahy from Fotolia.com
