Teenage Friendship Problems
Most children can't wait to become teenagers, only to find out that those years can be a minefield, especially among teenage girls and their cliques. It's painful for parents to watch their children's angst, but at least with understanding, some relief may come. Whether teens are on the outside of the group, looking in, or on the inside trying to play by the rules, it helps to know what is happening.
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Effects of Cliques
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Cliques are tight groups of friends, known for excluding others. Teenage cliques are often made up of the "popular" kids, and they let everyone know that they are "better" than the people who are not part of their clique. Although their main intent may not be to hurt and exclude other teenagers, that is exactly what they do. Members of the clique must follow certain rules in order to maintain their clique status, such as only socializing with other clique members. The problem teenagers have when they are in such a clique is the pressure to maintain their status and the fear of being excluded for doing something wrong.
Warnings On Bullying
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Clique behavior can lead to bullying, continually targeting and victimizing someone not in the group or bullying someone a clique member wants out of the group. The entire clique or just an individual can initiate the bullying. Whichever way, thousands of teenagers wake up in the morning and are afraid to go to school. Bullying can take the form of psychological control (such as gossiping), insults or physical violence. The person who is bullied can become sick and depressed, and in the most extreme cases, bullying can lead to suicide.
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Preventing Use of Drugs and Alcohol
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When a teenager's friends start to drink or use drugs, this can be almost impossible for some teenagers to resist doing themselves. On the one hand, if teenagers go along with their peers, they risk getting into legal trouble, getting into a car accident while driving under the influence or driving with someone who is, or they may begin to see their grades suffer. On the other hand, if they decide not to joint their friends, they run the risk of losing them. Of course, losing these types of friends is the better option for the teenager. Unfortunately, he or she rarely sees that. Parents can prevent teenagers from making the wrong choice regarding drugs and alcohol by role modeling and talking to their children, according to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.
Jealousy Considerations
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Sometimes teenagers become jealous of a friend. The reasons vary. Maybe the friend got a boyfriend or girlfriend first, has richer parents that can buy him or her nicer clothes, or is a better athlete. Maybe the friend spends time with other friends, prompting fear of losing the friendship. Whatever the reason, if one friend becomes jealous of another, this can destroy a friendship. Teens should learn how to talk with each other about their feelings to overcome the jealousy. In addition to parents, a school counselor can help teenagers get through social development issues such as these. Some churches offer counseling services as well, where teens can get help with jealousy issues.
Significance of Moving
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Teenagers can develop problems if they have to move and separate from their friends. After spending so much time finding the right peer group, to uproot from that can be devastating. They know that they will probably have to go through an awkward process of trying to fit in all over again in the new location. Teenagers often mope around after a move. Parents should make sure that they give their teens access to their old friends though the Internet or a cell phone, or best yet, by arranging a meeting in the near future.
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- Photo Credit Two smiling teenagers image by Monika 3 Steps Ahead from Fotolia.com
