Groom Wedding Etiquette

Remember: This is your day, too.

Planning a wedding can be a daunting task whether you want to have a small family gathering or a large, upscale event. There are many customs and traditions that are important for you, as the groom, to be aware of. Knowing what is expected of you will help you feel more comfortable with the planning process, as well take some of the pressure off your bride.

Asking Permission

Although it may seem outdated to some, asking the bride's family for their blessing prior to proposing is a custom that has yet to go out of style. Not only does it make the family feel included in the celebration of your love, but it will show your future bride all of the thought and planning that you put into your proposal.

At one time, it was traditional to only ask the bride's father for her hand in marriage, but this part of the tradition has undergone a transformation. Nowadays, it is appropriate to ask whichever family members the bride is closest to. Remember, be sneaky. It is supposed to be a surprise that you are seeking her family's approval.

Groomsmen

Groomsmen are the men that are closest to you, as well as any male family members on the bride's side that she is close with--for example, a cousin or a brother. You should also be sure that you and your bride will have the same number of attendants. The groomsmen have many responsibilities, one of which is escorting the female attendants to their places during the ceremony. Having an equal number will help the ceremony run that much smoother. Among your groomsmen, you will need to choose a best man. He is often the closest friend to you, which may be your brother, cousin or childhood friend.

Finances

Money is one of the biggest stressors you will encounter throughout the entire wedding process.

It is no longer customary for the groom or his family to only pay for the rehearsal dinner and alcoholic beverages. Although this is how it may work out in your situation, there are far fewer rules than there used to be about who should pay for what. Many couples are paying for the majority of their weddings on their own as the average age to get married is increasing.

The Reception

The reception is the time for the bride and groom to kick back and enjoy being with friends and family. It is important, however, to remember that you are around both of your families, as well as all your friends, and you don't want to do anything to embarrass yourself, such as drink too much alcohol or introduce someone by the wrong name. You will need to mingle and be sure that your guests are having a good time, but don't forget to dedicate the majority of your time to your bride. If you have anything you'd like to say publicly to your bride or your guests, this would be the appropriate forum.

Honeymoon

The honeymoon is a great responsibility for you to handle. While the bride is choosing flowers and a cake, spend time researching affordable options for your honeymoon. This process requires research and budgeting that might be more up your alley than choosing a centerpiece. Your bride may even trust your judgment to make the honeymoon a surprise.

References

• Life 123: Wedding Etiquette for the Groom
• The Plunge: Groom Advice: How to Carry Your Weight