How Do Teachers Work With Unsupportive Parents?

Cooperative parents can contribute to effective education.

Dealing with unsupportive parents is one of the chief causes of teacher burnout and may result in teachers leaving the profession. Along with uncooperative colleagues and students with discipline problems, parents who fail to support learning play a significant role in preventing a child from performing at an optimal level, causing stress for teachers and creating problems with the school administration.

The Problem

According to Time magazine, there are parents who insist that their child not be reprimanded or even corrected in school so as not to damage her self-esteem. Some parents bring extreme religious beliefs into conflict with curriculum, and others "help" at home a little too much, to the point where they complete assignments for their child. While parents are a vital part of the alliance that should exist between the home and the school, they are often defensive and actually undermine their child's education and self-reliance.

Effect on Teachers

Teachers find themselves taking time that should be spent developing ideas for classroom lessons dealing with parents who want constant updates, contest every grade or defend their child's actions, regardless of the facts. Unfortunately, this leads to many teachers leaving the profession by the time they reach their fifth year of teaching.

Communication

Overprotective parents may be insecure and in need of reassurance that their child is in good hands and on the right track. Devise a means of communicating with parents in between parent-teacher conferences. In some schools, computer programs allow parents to see grades, attendance and comments on a real-time basis. Teachers would do well to keep their responses professional at all times, and keep a record of communications. In extreme cases, a teacher might suggest a meeting with a parent and a guidance counselor or administrator.

Understanding

Many teachers know the feeling of greeting parents at a school conference or open house, only to find that the parents they most want to see do not show up. It may be that the parents are working two jobs or have responsibilities to other children or aging parents at home. Sometimes, in non-English-speaking households, language is a barrier. Teachers can try to find out the reasons and deal with them, but often they have to realize that the situation will not change and they have to do the best they can without the desired parental support.

Winning Over Confrontational Parents

The involvement of parents in education is important, but their involvement is most effective at home through supervision and discussions. Many parents support their children and the educational process in this way, but some are confrontational over grades, procedures and even curriculum. Parents need to understand that developing responsibility by bringing materials to school, writing down assignments and meeting deadlines is part of the educational process. By explaining, in detail, a child's offending behavior, parents may become more supportive.

References

• Education World: Speak Up or Burn Out
• Time: Parents Behaving Badly