Etiquette & Social Graces

Times have changed since Emily Post wrote her famous book on etiquette in 1922, but the need for the small social contracts that make up polite society haven't. Every culture in the world has an accepted code of etiquette and disdain for those who break that code. Manners and social graces don't just show off a person's level of education and charm. They show that he is considerate, caring and cooperative. Knowing the finer points of etiquette can help a person in every social situation, from a job interview to a dinner party to dating.

Workplace Etiquette

Getting (and keeping) a job is not only about your specific skill set. It is also about people skills. Someone who presents a polished, well-mannered demeanor will go farther than someone who doesn't.

When you go on a job interview, be on time and dress appropriately. After the interview, send a thank-you note to your potential employer.

If you work in a cubicle, avoid distracting your co-workers by talking loudly on the phone, or striking up personal conversations with those around you.

Say please and thank you to everyone, and never bark orders at those in lower positions.

When meeting clients or superiors, look them in the eye, smile confidently, and give a firm--but not aggressive--handshake.

Dining Etiquette

Most people know not to chew with their mouths open or go back to the salad bar with a dirty plate. But there are some more subtle tips that will help you to always be a welcome dining companion.

When dining out, the general rule is that the person who invites pays.

There is no situation--no matter how informal--in which it's appropriate to exchange business cards during a meal.

A woman should not apply lipstick at the table unless she is in an informal setting with close friends.

In social situations, it is appropriate for a man to stand when a woman excuses herself from the table. This is not necessary in business situations.

Internet Etiquette

Internet etiquette, or "netiquette," has some unique rules of its own.

Since it is difficult to convey a tone in text, you should invest extra time to carefully wording your emails and posts.

Never type in all capital letters, as this gives the impression that you are shouting.

Always capitalize appropriate letters, and use proper grammar and punctuation. Not doing so looks lazy and gives the impression that you don't care.

Avoid hitting "reply all" unless that is your intention.

Phone Etiquette

If a call disconnects, it is the responsibility of the person who initiated the call to call the other party back.

Only put someone on speakerphone if you have their permission first.

It is inappropriate to have a loud cell phone conversation about private matters in a public place. It is also inappropriate to take or place a cell phone call while dining with others.

General Tips

Those getting on an elevator should always wait for those who are getting off to do so.

The person who reaches the door first should open it for the other, regardless of gender.

It is not necessary to tip when you pick up take-out from a restaurant.

If an engagement is broken, it's appropriate for the bride to give back the ring, no matter who initiated the break-up.

References

• Website and E-mail Etiquette
• Manners International
• Emily Post Institute