Food for a Jewish Funeral
Following the death of an immediate family member, an observant Jew has many complex obligations to fulfill. The first seven days after a loved one's death are when the closest relatives of the deceased are "sitting shivah." During this time, those in mourning are largely homebound and focus almost exclusively on their grief. Providing food for the mourners before and after the funeral is a great comfort for the family.
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Know the Rules
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Before preparing any food, there are a few practical considerations. Find out---without calling the mourners---if the family keeps kosher. If they do, there are certain rules to be aware of; the Judaism 101 website is an excellent resource on all things Jewish, but the most basic rule is that dairy and meat products are not prepared or consumed together.
If you do not have a kosher kitchen, depending on the strictness of the mourning family's religious observance, you may want to purchase kosher foods at the grocery store rather than cook them yourself. Fruits and vegetables are "parve," which means neither meat nor dairy, and are always kosher, but utensils and dishes from a non-kosher kitchen may be a concern. It's also a good idea to find out if there are any food allergies or intolerances in the household.
Eggs
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For the post-funeral gathering, the United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism's website suggests making round-shaped foods, such as eggs. Such foods, the USCJ says in its guide to Jewish funerals, "are symbolic of the cycle of life." Eggs have an additional advantage: They are parve, which makes them ideal even if you don't know how religiously observant the mourning family is. Be aware, however, that eggs containing blood spots are not considered kosher by most Jews. Deviled eggs are a good choice for the post-funeral meal, or you can make egg salad.
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Wine and Snack Trays
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Other foods that are welcome during the mourning period are bottles of kosher wine or grape juice. With so many guests likely to arrive before and after the funeral, the family may find it hard to feed everyone. Consider slicing round fruits and vegetables and artfully assembling them on a disposable tray. Avoid dairy dips unless you know there will be dairy served at the meal. Cookies, brownies and cakes on trays are also welcome.
Casseroles
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Foods that freeze well, such as casseroles, should be labeled with ingredients and cooking instructions. All of the food that you bring should be in disposable containers, so the family's workload is lessened. It should also be labeled, at a minimum, with the words "dairy," "meat," or "parve." Kugel, pronounced "KOO-gull," is a savory or sweet casserole that can be served warm or at room temperature. It's a common sight at Jewish events and can be made with just about any fruit or vegetable you have on hand. Kugel can easily be made parve and freezes well.
Bread and Bagels
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If you're a baker or brave enough to give it a try, you could make challah---the braided egg bread used as part of the meal ritual on the Jewish sabbath. It is pronounced like "HAH-luh." Bringing bread helps the mourners continue their normal observances without having to bake or shop. If the post-funeral meal will be in the morning, consider bringing a platter of bagels and cream cheese. For a more sophisticated touch, include slices of lox---cured and smoked salmon you can find near the fish section at most supermarkets---and thinly sliced onions and tomatoes with the bagel platter.
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