- Anger is an emotion that tells you when you are upset, either over a situation or with a person. Anger is the brain's way of saying that your needs or expectations are not being met. You start to feel angry that things have not gone your way or you are not getting what you want. Many people can keep this emotion under control, and although they are upset with the situation, they may feel disappointed rather than angry.
- Expressing anger can be verbal, physical or both. If you do not have an anger control issue, you may express your unhappiness calmly, and know how to let someone know you are unhappy without expressing anger. If you do have an anger management problem, however, you won't know how to verbalize your feelings without showing anger, and may find yourself shouting at the person, or threatening him verbally or physically.
- With work, family and money problems, it can be easy to get angry at insignificant things. To deal with everyday stressful situations try to remain calm. For example, in heavy traffic keeping calm can prevent road rage and auto accidents. If someone cuts you off, tell yourself that it is no big deal, that he is a bad driver; then think of something else. When the traffic is thick and you want to get home, learn to relax by listening to and humming along with calming music.
- Work can be stressful if you have a busy schedule, a controlling boss, annoying co-workers and pushy customers. If you feel yourself getting angry on the job, try excusing yourself, whether you are talking on the phone, are in a meeting, or with a customer. Go to a quiet place and regroup. Take deep breaths and tell yourself to be calm. Talking to yourself can head off anger episodes. Remind yourself that your health, reputation and job depend on you being calm and relaxed.
- Sometimes trying to handle anger on your own does not work, especially in extreme situations. In those cases there are professionals to help people with extreme anger problems. A professional anger management coach can help you learn how to recogzine your accomplishments rather than focusing on your failures. Professionals also can help you learn how to request things from others rather than demand, how to respond to situations rather than react, and how to get in touch with your emotions so you can understand what triggers your anger.
