How Long Should You Date Before Marrying?

Dating is like a long interview process. Figuring out what you want (and finding out what you will get) is essentially the point. Getting to know someone takes time, and the amount of time it takes per couple varies. So, however long it takes to do that is the amount of time you should date before getting married.

Time Frame

Marrying someone that you have only known for a few weeks is reckless. On the other hand, having a long drawn-out relationship for years and years is not ideal either. Date for a minimum of one year before marriage. This will allow you the opportunity to experience all holidays, birthdays and other special occasions at least one time together. Another two to three years is a reasonable amount of time to date before getting married.

Benefits

The great thing about dating for one to four years before marriage is that it allows people to gradually move away from their single self and start thinking in terms of "we" instead of "me." Dating also allows you the freedom to see other people (initially anyway) and learn what else is out there, which just might make you appreciate what you've got enough to take the plunge.

Considerations

Age is a major factor in the decision to marry. Teenagers may date all through high school without being ready to get married, since there are major financial concerns, housing and expectations of marriage to be figured out.
Personality is another factor. Some people are less available physically and emotionally at the beginning of a relationship. Some are slow to share their feelings. Therefore, they need more time and may not be comfortable agreeing to marry someone after a year or two.

Significance

Besides getting to know the other person, dating enables you to learn things about yourself and your own needs. It also allows a couple to establish their identity as a unit, thus setting forth a foundation for the relationship.

Potential

When friendships turn into relationships, the amount of time you date may be less, depending on how well and how long you knew each other before becoming a couple. If the friendship has been a long and close one, you may find yourself engaged in a matter of weeks once the spark finally lights, and well on your way to a happy marriage.

Resources

• Working through relationship problems
• Things to discuss before marriage