Living together before marriage is like a trial run of what it is like to live with your future spouse. The firsthand knowledge obtained during this time can be beneficial. However, it can also lead to broken marriage proposals or act as a harbinger for divorce. In fact, studies have found that people who live together are more likely to divorce than those who did not live together before marriage.
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Considerations
Prior to getting married, where you will live must be determined. If you live with your partner prior to marriage, will you continue to live in the same place after you are married? Are you moving to a new place? Also, is living together before marriage accepted by your religion or the religion of your future spouse? Who will be responsible for paying the bills? Are you going to split the cost of the rent or mortgage payments? In addition to sharing them, who is responsible to pay when computers, televisions or major appliances need to be repaired or replaced? Most importantly, who gets to keep living there if the relationship never develops into marriage?
Effects
Sometimes living together before marriage causes one or both partners to question whether they want to go ahead with their wedding. Incompatibilities may surface or worsen when encountered on a daily basis. For example, if one of you is a morning person and the other is not, this can affect sleep patterns and cause tension or irritability. Even if you find that living together is not problematic, the potential of marriage may be questioned. To put it simply, if you are already living together, why get married?
Function
Knowing why your partner wants to get married is important because the expectations that you and your partner have may be unclear. Similarly, the reason for living together before marriage should be known by both parties. Sometimes living together for financial reasons cannot be avoided. However, agreeing to live with someone for the purpose of getting to know that person better before marriage may not always work.
Significance
Dr. David Gudel estimates that one in two couples will live together before getting married. In some states, living together for a certain period of time constitutes common law marriage. The individuals must perceive themselves as a married couple with intent to marry. In jurisdictions where common law marriages are considered legally binding, the ending of such relationships require the couple to go through the divorce process.
Warning
Cohabitation is one of the anticipated allures of marriage. The union between two people is the beginning of a new relationship. Coming home to a new residence after the honeymoon is a symbol of this new beginning. Living in the same place before marriage and after marriage removes the mystique of what it is like to live with this person. Also, should the relationship end prior to marriage, the division of assets can be much more difficult since protections under the law are vague in such instances.
Sociologists use the term "cohabitation" to describe two people in a romantic relationship living together. While some people believe marriage is necessary,...
The Free Dictionary defines cohabitation as a living arrangement in which an unmarried couple lives together in a long-term relationship that resembles...
